Childhood and life before depression

Most of the people we interviewed tried to explain why they had become depressed. Many believed their depression was the result of chemical imbalances in their bodies, but even these people entertained other possible reasons. One woman thought that her depression might have started at the age of 13, triggered by the start of her periods. But around this time her parents had also divorced, she lost a best friend, and she had troubles at school, and she thought these might also have contributed.

Many people said that when they were children, they had been very sensitive to upheavals such as moving to another area or changing schools or had felt hurt because they felt different from other children or were bullied. Others felt they were to blame for events that were out of their control. Some people were bright as children and did not fit in at school, feeling different, bruised, or traumatised by their lack of acknowledgement and support.

Was worried and sickly as a child, and then when he went into secondary school he was bullied and…

Age at interview 35

Gender Male

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When she was a child she thought she was going into a children’s home as a punishment because she…

Age at interview 63

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 30

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At a similar time her parents broke up, her best friend left, she moved to middle-school, and she…

Age at interview 27

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 16

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Not all reported difficulties in their families when they were young, yet such problems were common among the people we talked to. Some had dealt with unpredictable and violent parents; felt misunderstood by parents; had rigid upbringings; experienced a lack of parental understanding that their problems were not laziness; felt parents did not approve of them or their lifestyle; had to cope with a parent with mental health problems; had parental pressure to ‘succeed’; experienced emotional neglect and in some cases physical and sexual abuse. One woman felt her parents were ‘too supportive’, not allowing her to learn about life. Most depressed people seek an explanation for their illness in the events of their lives, particularly their childhood, but this should not be taken to mean that such events inevitably lead to depression. Many children come through a disturbed childhood without getting depression in later life, though for others it may be a powerful contributory factor.

She links her current day anxiety to the unpredictability of her parents arguments and father’s…

Age at interview 36

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 34

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Gets angry with people who complain about relatively minor problems with their families because…

Age at interview 24

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 14

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Says that parents can be part of the problem in depression, and just as they can be abusive, they…

Age at interview 47

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 32

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It was very common for people to have had a loss or trauma, or a ‘life event’ that affected them very deeply. People said they were not always aware of their grief or trauma at the time. Indeed, some found it difficult to understand that they could be so affected by things that happened decades ago. One man said, ‘While I was depressed, I couldn’t see that my mum’s death at aged 8 was such a big factor, and now I can.’ A number of people were unsure about the role of events in the past. For instance, one man witnessed people dying in the Second World War. But he believed his depression was more likely to be due to a chemical imbalance. Clearly though, current day situations could trigger grief reactions that were buried deep in the distant past. Some people suffered losses (e.g., relationship breakdowns) as adults that contributed to depression.

Had a difficult childhood and family life, and lost her grandparents in 1996, which was very…

Age at interview 33

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 24

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His grandmother died and he became anxious his mother would also die. When his father later died,…

Age at interview 50

Gender Male

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Witnessed bombing and the shooting of people during WWII, and wondered if this had affected him.

Age at interview 73

Gender Male

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At university she was dealing with grief from her father’s death when she was 3 years old.

Age at interview 40

Gender Female

Age at diagnosis 37

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Several women became depressed after the birth of their children. One woman felt that there was almost a conspiracy not to tell women how having a baby can turn their worlds upside down. Before her severe depression she had lost her mother-law, had a difficult labour, and been traumatised when her son did not breathe at first. Her depression made it difficult for her to bond with her son.

Some people had multiple issues that they were struggling with that just seemed to overwhelm their coping skills. One man who had never had depression before suffered a severe episode after considerable disruptions, including two deaths in the family and workplace changes.

His mother died, he was bullied, was neglected, isolated, lacked social skills, and he was…

Age at interview 35

Gender Male

Age at diagnosis 17

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Just before he became depressed he lost family members, there were workplace changes, and members…

Age at interview 68

Gender Male

Age at diagnosis 57

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Life events do not always lead to depression. Some people who had had depression in the past and had been treated were pleasantly surprised that they could cope well with life events, even severe difficulties.

See also our Young people and depression section.

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