Bereavement due to suicide
Help from Cruse Bereavement Care
A priest helped Patricia when Andrew was missing. He offered friendship and informal counselling....
Cruse Bereavement Support Volunteers, who see bereaved people individually, have undergone a 48 hour training course over a number of weeks, which can include nationally recognised certification. Most of the people who work for Cruse call themselves ‘volunteers’, even if they have worked for Cruse for a long time, though GPs and others often call them ‘counsellors’. (People who have had a different training elsewhere, but who work for Cruse, may call themselves ‘Counsellors’ in their own right, rather than volunteers).
The first thing the person from Cruse said to Helen was, You can get over this, but only if you...
They saw me quite quickly, because sometimes you have to wait a while. And they saw me quite quickly, and it was a very nice man that I used to see. And he was, he was just brilliant but he used to make me, not make me, but ask me to tell him everything about what had happened, and even down to when I went to see Charlotte after she’d died at the hospital. And of course that was extremely painful and I think I cried nearly through every session, most of the time, but I think you need to get it out, I think I learnt as well with my daughter, because she suffered with depression for so long, if you have feelings that you don’t let out and you don’t speak about, I think it’s much more of a chance that you will become depressed also. And I haven’t taken anti-depressants at all since, after losing Charlotte. I think I’ve just found ways to, to speak about it, but I‘ve only spoken to people that I’ve wanted to speak to, about these things.
And seeing someone from Cruse was helpful?
Very helpful, he was, he was, I can’t remember exactly the things he said to me now but I think that one of the first things he said, one of the first things he said to me was, “You can get over this, but only if you want to.” And at the time I thought it was slightly harsh, but actually it wasn’t, it was very good advice I think. And I think, I needed to get over it because I have four grandchildren, one of which was Charlotte’s. And you can’t live a very unhappy life and be miserable all the time around four children and they were, except for Charlotte’s baby, the other three were all old enough to understand what had happened, and they talked about it constantly.
The Cruse counsellor was a great source of support. Felicity saw her regularly for about a year...
Had she had any particular training do you think?
Last reviewed July 2017.
Last updated January 2015.