Yeah, yeah all my friends are totally, all knew right from the start that I was that I was diabetic. And there was, there was time when I was first diagnosed where all my friends were looking at my injection, injections and the blood tester kits and all going, ‘Oh can I have a go, can I have a go?’ and you’re kind of you know changing the, changing the lancets and letting them having a go at testing their blood sugars and just you know it’s just a bit of fun.

People trying to understand what you’re going through and understand exactly what you have to do. And like I’ve never really been one to shy away from the fact that I’ve got it and I want, I’m quite happy that people know about it and don’t pussy foot around about the fact that I’ve got it because if there ever was something to happen and I haven’t told people then it would be my mistake that you know and it would be my own fault if people are saying, ‘Oh what’s up with him, what’s up with him is he alright, is he alright?’ And I haven’t told them, I just feel it’s much better, especially close friends they’re so supportive and so willing to help you in any way that they possibly can. You know, you know you say that you need some breakfast, you need a snack and they’re willing to sort you out, you want a glass of coke they’ll go and buy you one when you’ve got no money things like that. Just, I’ve just found my friends totally supportive and like amazing, amazingly, amazingly there for me all the time, just when I’ve needed them to be there. So I, I’d advise anyone to tell their friends. And anybody who is going to make an issue of it is not really the sort of friend that you want really.

Well. I’ve never had any problems. My friends have always accepted me they’re a good bunch of people. They’re – just because I was different to them, they didn’t treat me any differently. I was always treated the same and quite often they’d kind of forget, in a way, because I never had any problems. So they’d say, ‘Oh do you want to stay round so and so’s house, and I’d say ‘Yeah, I’ll take my insulin with me, and stuff like that – and they’d say, ‘Oh, sorry’, but yeah. But I’ve never had any problems. I’ve stayed with a lot of my family members and they’ve been really good, and they sort of worry too much really because they know I’ve got diabetes. My nan, she always used to make sure I was all right all the time, and I was like, ‘Yeah, I’m okay’, [laughs] but yeah, yeah, they’ve been brilliant.

You were saying something about when you go with your friends?

Yeah when I go out with my friends well yeah because you’re, you’re meeting new people and sometimes they, well, they won’t know that you’re diabetic and if you go out for a drink and you have one too many or something, not that it’s ever happened to me of course. And you know, sometimes you’re not in control. You know, you’re in a car crash or something looking on the bright side of course then you know people have got to know got to know that you’re diabetic.

Do your best friends know what to do in case you have a hypo?

Yes, yes some more than others. I mean I have this one friend that’s kind of first aid kind of freak and she, shed know exactly what to do. Shed push everyone out the way just to get a chance to do it. But yeah I think. You know it’s, it’s come up in conversations so they, they’d have known. If they didn’t then just call 999 I guess that’s the easiest way. But if I’m, if I’m shaking. If it, you know, if it’s just normal symptoms I mean, not worse case scenario if I’m just going low then they might hand me a few sugar cubes or something.

Do you wear the?

The diabetic pendant. Yes I do, not all the time. When I’m, when I’m going out with my friends and you know I’m, because most of the time, well almost all the time I have something with me. I’ve got glucose tablets on me at the moment, I always carry those around wherever I go. But yeah when you, when you’re unsure whether you know. You, you’re really tired and you want to go to sleep or something then you might go low during the night. And it’s nice that the paramedics are going to, you know, they’re going to know that you’re diabetic when they find you’re unconscious on the floor, yeah.

And what about your friends? Do you tell your friends and acquaintances that you have diabetes?

Yes. When I got diabetes I told all the friends that I see and meet on a regular basis that I have diabetes. And actually a surprising number of people just know about diabetes from their own relatives or friends themselves which already have it. And it doesn’t affect your relationships with people in any way. And everybody is totally, gets used to the fact that you have diabetes. It changes very very little. New people who you meet, like now that I’ve been diabetic for five years, people I met like recently eventually just pick it up. Because if you’re going out to eat with a large number of people, you’ll be injecting. And it will just become second nature to them. Because so many people know about diabetes now.

It depends from person to person, but some people want to talk about their diabetes with their friends more than others, and depending on the type of friends they are. Like I know, I’ve got a few very close friends and they know all about my diabetes from top to bottom. And they’ll spot me if I’m having a hypo at school. Which is very very useful, because it’s always nice to have the assurance that if something goes wrong therell be somebody else who’ll know exactly what to do. But you don’t need all your friends to know that. And often many friends want to know how your diabetes is and how it works. And it’s up to you to tell them if you want or not. Like don’t feel embarrassed if somebody, if you don’t want to show them or tell them things about diabetes. Just keep it very short and say, ‘Oh, it just, I have to eat certain things and inject at certain times’ and leave it at that. It shouldn’t be an embarrassment to have diabetes.

I find one of the big things, a lot of my friends aren’t necessarily that more sympathetic but they don’t realise how big a thing it is for me. And a lot of people are quite na’ve about diabetes, not many people know the real facts and don’t realise that there are these complications when I get older. So they think that [purring] because I started off, when I started at Uni I didn’t want it to be really affecting exactly what I was doing and, so I let myself just carry on and I was, I was, I’ll really get a grip of it. I wasn’t that bad but I was like, moment and then I’d go out and do things as I normally would and I wasn’t thinking about my diabetes the whole time, trying to get it under control. Because I managed for the first year or so my friends don’t see why now I’m suddenly going, ‘Oh, I’ve got to get, take it more seriously. I’ve got to really get a grip. And they’re like, ‘Well you were fine last year, what, why are you now? Why do you have to, why do you have to make such a, you know, be so strict with yourself?’ ‘Why can’t you have a chocolate? Why can’t you come for a run now? Why can’t you, whatever?’ And it’s difficult to tell them, ‘Well because if I don’t I might not have eyesight,’ and you know, you don’t want to be so melodramatic. And a lot of my friends don’t realise that it is, there are these long-term effects. So it would be good if the, if everyones educated about it a little bit better, I guess.

So they’there is a need to promote public awareness?

Yeah, because I think people think I’m being a bit of a hypochondriac sometimes when I’m probably being the opposite [laughs].

So when you were growing up with diabetes, perhaps one of the most difficult times is when you are in secondary school?

Yes, yep, definitely because, you get bullying everywhere, I’ll admit that, everybody’ll admit that, but you know? [Exhales] you just deal with it, if you had the kind of attitude well okay I’m here, this is what I have, please ask a question, please, you know, you know, ask em, ‘Why, why, why’, why’re they stood there laughing at you, or making rude comments? Blatantly go and say, ‘Well, you wanna ask a question please do, I have as much information as you want. Or, ‘Please go on this website. Or, ‘Please go to the doctors. Or, ‘Ask, theres plenty of leaflets. And, and you know, all sorts that, you know, theres so much information about diabetes or any other illness, or disability, or whatever out there, and if these people instead of stood there making fun at you did that then the world would be a much nicer place.

Was it because you were injecting in public or?

No.

Because you happened to have diabetes and they didn’t know what it was all about?

Yeah, really I think the most [exhales] the most of the problems came from the fact that I had this little leather handbag and I was carrying it around with me, ’cause we didn’t have pockets in our uniforms, you know? And we weren’t allowed to carry our rucksacks or, our, you know, big bags around with us all the time. And everyone knows you’re gonna have something with you all the time because no-one knows when and where a hypo will strike. [Dog barking] so yeah, yeah, I think, mainly, yeah the problems came from that, my little leather handbag [laughs].

You were different?

Yeah.

In which way?

Absolutely yeah, no-one likes anyone that’s different, so.

Let’s talk a little bit about your experience in secondary school? Did you talk to your Mum around that time?

Yeah. I think well if I didn’t have her or my dad, I wouldn’t have got through it, you know, so, well sometimes it was very, very difficult and sometimes I was just, you know, [sighs] where do I go from here? And, okay so I’ve sounded quite positive, but, it wasn’t easy, you know? To say, yeah to say that I was constantly ill, oh yeah it’s fine, you know, bully me I don’t care, to say that would be a lie. because it wasn’t easy, at all, it really was not because it’s not, you know, at the very end of the day, bullying, it’s not right, everyone knows that, even the bullies know that, bullying know, you know bullies know that you shouldn’t make people feel like that.

Right before I was very dependent on them – probably more than I should have been, you know, like, they injected me morning and evening I could look – I felt I could look after myself, but I’d more rely on them to do it rather than me. I was kind of being lazy in a way because I – It stopped me socialising more because when I went round my friends house I had to go home a certain time because my injection needed doing or – and I felt I couldn’t really go out – go out with friends because I felt that if something happened what would I do, you know? So I was very dependent on them and my life was just same old, same old really. But after – like now, it’s just completely changed and it’s hard to believe what I was like before. I’m going out all the time – going to parties, going round friends’ houses and injecting, just looking after myself more, and they’re not really doing anything. Like they’re there for me but I’m more the diabetic now, whereas they were before, so when I’m low I deal with myself, when I’m high – I keep blood checks. It’s just really surreal how I was before to now. I’m just doing everything for myself than I weren’t before, just because I was more dependent on them.

How were you feeling at that time?

Quite depressed really, because I used to come home at the end of the day and think all my friends had it easy in a way, because, you know, they had – they could do what they wanted. I was quite angry – really angry. I sometimes get angry now because I still think why me, but like my friends, they could have their dinner any time they wanted. They didn’t have a tight control. They didn’t have to have, like, injections, so I was quite down really, and that’s what probably prompted me to say to the doctor even more that I wanted help, so I weren’t really happy with how things were going and I just thought – I didn’t really see my future, I just thought it would be – I didn’t really look ahead because I didn’t think that I’d be capable of doing stuff for myself. I just weren’t happy at all, but now I’m just completely the opposite.

So you were lacking confidence?

Yeah, very much so, yeah.

I know initially at primary school my mum mentioned to me quite a few years later that perhaps in the early stages I wouldn’t have been invited back to friends houses after school for meals or to stay the night at friends houses so much initially because I think at the stage where my parents were controlling all my diabetes for me a lot of my friends’ parents were quite apprehensive about dealing with the diabetes and what would happen if there was a problem, would they be responsible and that sort of thing. But as times gone on. I think it was when I was about eight or nine, I started doing my own injection and from the time I started at secondary school I really started taking control of my diabetes myself and altering my dosage to fit if it wasn’t going quite right. Just keep keeping a check on it all. From that stage onwards they knew that I knew what I was doing and I’ve been doing for many years, so they were quite happy to let me go off. And they knew that I could always ring them at anytime and that like on the mobile or house phone if there were any problems. And a couple of times I did find say’I didn’t know what with the whole insulin thing, you might be around a friend’s house and then you might like in spare of the moment decide to spend the night there or something, then I wouldn’t have necessarily have my insulin equipment on me. So I was quite lucky that my parents were really supportive that they’d be prepared to say, drive half an hour to what wherever it was to bring it over and make sure I had the equipment. But’ that was the only problem. But they were really helpful in it.

So that was because it was so strict, but you had room for being spontaneous and do things’?

Yes, but I mean a couple of times I found I had to get my parents to drive over at the last minute with my insulin so that I could carry on staying longer at an activity or something like that that I hadn’t anticipated before hand. But after that I found quite often if I was say going out in the afternoon with friends even if I wasn’t planning on staying till dinnertime, I’d quite often just bring my insulin testing kit and things with me anyway, just have it in case as back up, which was quite useful.

The big controversy as well, doing injections in public.. A lot of people are very sort of, ‘Oh no, well why can’t you, why can’t you go somewhere else? Why can’t you go to the toilet and do it for example? You know, people don’t wanna have to look at that. And one example really was only recently, was when I first started University, were sat there in the canteen, were all about to have something to eat, I whipped me pen out, you know, bang into my leg, done and my friend [name] was like, ‘Well, well why can’t you do that somewhere else? Why do you have to do that in front of everybody? You know, can’t you go to the toilet? I think that’s really, really rude. And [laughs] I sat there with my mouth open and I said to her, ‘[Name] I need this to keep alive, you know, it’s keeping me alive as is that meal I’m just about to eat. I says, ‘You have a problem with it look away, nobody’s asking you to look. You know, and absolutely everybody were, you know, on my side, well they’re saying, ‘Well, you know, what effort is it for you to turn your head away and not look? Whereas what effort is it, effort it is for [Name] to get up, take herself off somewhere else, into a toilet where it’s not very hygienic at all, well when, so when, why should she have to?.

And I was quite shocked actually that everybody else was sort of like, well okay then. I wasn’t just me, or just me and my friend [name], from secondary school, we were alls, yeah they were all on my side, and you do find theres a lot of ignorance, a lot of ignorance in, you know, in the, in the world. For example I went to a supermarket caf and it was fairly early but I was very, very hungry and I thought ‘okay well if I’m not going to have something now’, I think it was about ten o’clockish and I hadn’t, had a lot of breakfast and I’d started feeling, okay well I’m going to have to go get myself something to eat. So I went and sat down in this caf and okay admittedly, yeah I had a fairly big meal for that time of day, and I thought ‘well okay, if I have this now I won’t have to have any lunch until, you know, one, two o’clock. And this woman looked over at me and she went, ‘Hungry are we?. And I thought, ‘Well what’s it got to do with you love?’ [laughs], you know, so I went, ‘Well yeah. And she kept blatantly staring at me the whole time, so I sat down, and I thought ‘Okay well what’s your problem?’ [laughs], you know she was really staring at me. And so I thought, ‘Okay I got me insulin pen out, straight into my arm and she sat there with her mouth open, and thought ‘well, you know, I looked at her and went, you know, openly sort of said okay then you want to ask a question please do so, and she just, you know her head went down and she wasn’t looking at me any more, she actually sat there like this [laughs]. So I think, ‘Well why?’ I really don’t understand why people have to have a problem, or why they have to blatantly stare at you and she didn’t any more, she completely avoided looking at me. And I think ‘well it’s petty, it really is. And I think if everybody else could have that kind of attitude as in well okay, you want to ask a question, you want to look at me, please do. And like I say, it’s not everybody, yeah, not everybody can.

Yeah, bringing it home was weird, because you think medical things are for hospitals, and you don’t really – but – it was a bit scary. But once you get over the initial shock it’s just something you do every day, and’ It is awkward at first, and I didn’t want to tell anyone. But I had good friends, and you talked to them. They would be a bit shocked first of all like mine were and then slowly they were like, ‘Oh, that’s okay. And I remember I used to go to the toilets to do my injection, if I ever needed to do it at school, which I didn’t in the beginning. But if I was at sleepovers or staying round my friend’s house, I used to hide away. But they got used to it, and I got used to doing it in front of them, and I just carry on with them now like if I’m – even if I’m out and about I just – I know that’s debatable, but I feel comfortable with it and –

So you feel comfortable doing it now, in public places?

Yeah. I think it’s just – as long as you make people around you aware, and as long as you tell them, and they’re not scared of needles, then you should be okay.

In your experience how have girlfriends reacted to when you tell them that you have diabetes?

They don’t really mind I don’t think. I mean they’re, they’re girlfriends can be sort of like your parents, they, if you, once they know about it they’ll, they’ll nag you because they care as well. But it, it’s no harder to get a girlfriend with diabetes than it is without. I mean obviously your sex life is still the same. I mean obviously you have to be more careful but everything is basically the same.

Why do you say ‘be more careful?

Well for instance you, all that exercise I mean like when your upstairs in your bedroom you have to make sure that you know when you’re having a hypo for when you’re obviously having sex and stuff like that. Obviously you’re more prone to diseases and stuff like that so you have to make sure you use protection and just general stuff like that really.

They told me that if I didn’t control my count that when I get older I could become impotent. And obviously not have the sex life I’ve got now which is quite scary because you know, every bloke likes to have a bit of love, do you know what I mean. And it was, it was frightening and it made me think, oh, you know. I don’t want that to be out of order, you know. I, I’d better start controlling it. Do you know what I mean. I don’t think my girlfriend would have been too happy at the time either. So you got, you got to think about it, you know. You’ve got to be sensible.

Ok so that message got to you loud and clear?

Yeah that got to me loud and clear, you know [laugh]. Straight away.

So one of the things that I think I do find tedious is a lot of the questions people ask and the misconceptions people have about diabetes. That’s, yeah that’s something tedious when, when someone will say. They, they are trying to be nice but they might say, Oh if you go low do I need to inject you? And you’sre like, No, just don’st. And they are just trying to help and there’s these misconceptions everywhere. And so they’sll go, Do you inject sugar? [OOOH] Does that mean you can’st eat sweets or does that mean you ate too many sweets when you were a kid? And then the misconceptions having to explain to everyone you meet the difference between Type 1 and Type 2 diabetes. And explain that actually Type 1 is the hand you’sre dealt. You’sve got it now and Type 2 is something that in, not in all cases but in many cases it’s linked with lifestyle. So you, you’sve obviously got that balancing out to the people. As soon as they hear the word, type, diabetes. They assume Type2 and they’sve got all the stigma associated with Type 2. And then you have to explain to them that you’sre not Type 2, you’sre Type 1 and this is Type 1 and. Yeah, yeah it’s two completely different conditions and I don’st like having to deal with the people assuming that you are Type 2.

I mean obviously I’ve, I have told all my friends that I, that I have diabetes. I’ve never had any problem with that. That’s one thing, I’ve never found it something embarrassing or anything that I’ve got to hide from people, you know. I want people to know. And also I can be a bit of a diabetes bore sometimes, you know. I just want to tell people what, what it is. Because I didn’t know what it was really before I had it myself. So if the, if the topic ever comes up I just go, ‘Oh, yes, well, this is Type 1, this is Type 2’ and just go into the whole explaining thing. And I think, yes, I have said, you know, that, what the signs of a hypo can be. I mean most of the time when I go out it’s, it’s with my boyfriend, and he knows, he knows about it. And I’ve, hes never had to do it, but I’ve taught him like how to test my sugar levels. And he knows that, you know, if I go a bit shaky then, then hes to get me, you know, some orange juice or Coca Cola. And I keep sugar tablets with me as well.