But where I have been lucky is like I said, my own cardiologist, my GP, the woman who runs the cardiac have just answered every question I’ve had. My own cardiologist has never said, well we don’t do this. Shes always like before shes adding another tablet, she explains why, why she feels the need for this and that and I think you feel a lot better in yourself.

You feel as though it’s being done as a partnership, rather than the impersonal approach of this, this and this, cheerio, well see you in a few months. I think that’s been so important that has, really.

I think, like I say, communication, even if it’s an admission of a lack of knowledge is so important because you really are in no man’s land, because suddenly something’s happened to you, that’s going to affect you for the rest of your life and you know nothing about it because you haven’t been expecting it.

It’s not something that was anticipated and I think whatever they do for people, always explain why they’re doing what they’re doing.

I don’t mean in a crisis slowing down and explaining, but in the general run of things always explain why they’re doing what they’re doing. And even if they say they don’t know the answer to that question, but I’ll go and find out. But theres nothing worse than having anything done to you or prescribed for you and nobody’s explained why.

I think they need to sit down, you know, at the same level as you and explain things in a language that you understand because sometimes when they, when they say things, you know, you need to know all the procedures. When they speak in medical terms that’s just no good for me, anyway, I don’t understand all the medical terms;

But, on the whole, the doctors and nurses were, were brilliant and, well, the ones that I’ve actually seen myself. No, no, everybody that I’ve seen, I haven’t got no, no problems with anyone that I’ve seen, no;

It must be difficult for, for them doing their jobs as well because, you know, they’re trying to help somebody who’s had a heart attack but, as much as they, it’s hard, probably hard for them to understand the patient as it is for the patient to understand what the doctor’s trying to say as well, so. And when you do have a heart attack you’re all in shock and you don’t know what you’re talking about, anyway I didn’t, just didn’t have a clue;

We had two very different experiences from consultants, now whether this is a difference between cardiologists and surgeons I don’t know. The cardiologist, my wife and I called Dr Death because he just gives it pretty much as it is, and, and when I said that they’d called my family in on the Saturday night, they’d been there till ooh, maybe 10, 11 oclock whatever on the Saturday some of them and they’d gone home.

My family are 40 miles from here, they’re not next door and then they were called back in at 1 oclock in, it was early in the morning, in the early hours of Sunday morning they were called in to be told look you’d better come across, because we really don’t think hes going to be here much longer. And on the Saturday they’d been arguing about whether they were going to do this balloon, so they’d already been talking about that before I got really bad.

And the Dr Death as we call him, it’s a good job I don’t give you the names here isn’t it, [laugh], had been saying, ‘I don’t think hell be around next week’, you know. Where as the surgeon is saying, ‘Oh hell be up and fine, hell have no problems. So you’d that kind of polar view, both from very senior people and my family didn’t know which one to take, because they hung on this one, the positive one.

I think hes probably going to think hes trying to give it like it could be, but he probably over does how bad it could be. You don’t want an over realistic view but similarly you don’t want to be told that just ‘Well, no it, you could be dead, because I think everybody knows if it’s heart, you know, if it’s a serious heart problem, yes of course you could be dead, you wouldn’t be here otherwise, just slightly overplayed it. But having said that I think I have surprised him and that’s maybe because I’m young and as I said I was fit.

Oh they argue. They do, they do. Some wanted to operate, some didn’t. Some said this was good. Some, one doctor come along and said I don’t want you to get out of bed at all, now you stay right there and you do not move for twenty four hour.

Another doctor comes along, What are you doing lying in bed, I want you walking up and down this ward I said, well I don’t know how I’m going to lie in bed and walk up and down the ward at the same time, it cannot be done doctor.

It can’t be done. Doctor so and so told me to lay in bed, you’re telling me to get up And he marched off, so he probably went and had a row with the doctor that said this before, I don’t know what happened. So I compromised and stayed in bed for a while, then I got up for a while, it seemed to work.

And the other comment I would just wish to make at this point in time, when I talk to my GP and they say, Have you had a letter from the consultant yet Oh yes, yes, weve had a letter What does it say Oh well, yeah you should take doxisorsan, that’s right What else Yeah, hes referred you for an angiogram Yeah, okay

I’ve almost sort of almost got to tease the information out yet it’s about me and it’s me that’s more concerned than either the consultant or the GP and sort of dragging that information out of the GP is a bit frustrating also. But I don’t want this to be interpreted or seen as sort of disappointment with them, because I know, I firmly believe they’re doing they’re very, very best to keep me you know, as fit and healthy as they possibly can.

I just think there are some sort of fine tuning that they could do with sort of minor, just minor changes to attitude and be much more open. Now it could well be some patients don’t want to hear that, you’ve got the information, you just give me the treatment, you think what you want. But I’m the opposite.

I like to know everything that they are saying about me and I like to find and I believe I have a right to hear that if it suits my personality and it does. I would much rather hear the very worst news about myself, than someone try and keep it from me. I would much rather have it, look me straight in the eye and tell us the worst. I cope with it, I’ll take it, or I’ll deal with as the best I can.