Holidays were a problem, I don’t think I went on holiday for two years after my major illness, we had arranged that, the year I was ill, we had arranged to go to Fort William, Scotland, and we had to cancel that. And then I don’t think we went away for two years. And then we started to go away on one of these coach holidays. And all we have to do is get a taxi to take us from here to the bus station, they take the luggage and we don’t see it again until it comes to our bedroom, and this is what we do and this is very enjoyable, to be able to do that. And I think it’s wonderful to be able to do that. I mean last year we went to the north of Scotland to Ullapool and we went to Ireland, who would ever have thought that I could ever do that!

Well no I, if we go on holiday I’ve got to pick a holiday where there isn’t a lot of activity in it, so now it’s more or less just laze around by the pool. Or we go a short walk or well go on bus trips so that there is, we see everything but we don’t have to do the walking.

So in a way you have to plan your holiday?

Oh yes, yes very, we do have to plan our holidays to see, we have to certainly make sure that it’s not too active. I mean neither of us are getting any younger and we like to get away – we used to have a caravan but weve had to do away with the caravan because I couldn’t help to do, pull it about or put the awning up or anything like that, it was just too much.

When you do, you always read the brochure and you try to find out from somebody else if they’ve been there, what it is like, if there is a lot of climbing or if theres, because a lot of the hotels don’t have lifts, and if there was a lot of stairs I couldn’t manage, I couldn’t manage to go.

I don’t know how long I can, the last cruise I went on I had to stagger down to Dover and I went down by night bus and I nearly killed myself with it. But this time it’s out of Leith and back into Leith and next year, would you believe, if I’m still alive, that’s Dover again but I’m going to fly down to Gatwick and do it all differently. But I’m just wondering how long I can in fact cruise. You know you can’t do it forever and the old puffiness and breathing, etc, it makes it look as if, you know the termination is not going to be so very long. But still, I’m going to enjoy while I can and let’s see how it goes.

Or [pause] perhaps more important has been the fact that I can’t get travel health insurance at the moment. (I think somebody should help… help us look into this.) So… my wifes going over to see my daughter in America in a fortnight’s time but I, I won’t go because I wouldn’t run the risk of being in America without adequate health insurance, travel insurance… I was insured through the BMA scheme – British Medical Association scheme – but they have told me that they will not insure me under any circumstances at present.

I believe I have some cover through my Visa [card] but I’m really not sure when one is asked questions by the by the Visa company people whether if one really had a big claim in America let’s say, whether they would consider that you were covered or not. But ordinary insurance such as you go to buy from the bank or building society or travel, travel agency, if you’re honest and say what you’re on, and what in my case has happened to me, then there is a point blank refusal to give you cover.

So your worlds shrunk a bit, your opportunities?

‘One time I was sort of momentarily a bit tearful was when having been promised by the BMA travel people that if I fulfilled certain criteria – periods of time following surgery and so on – then I would be covered, was to ring up and be told, ‘Well weve changed the rules and we won’t cover you under any circumstances,’ that’s when I felt my world had come in on me rather.

Of course when you travel it’s a bit of a nuisance because you have to take all sorts of medications with you. When we went for two weeks holiday out to Egypt I had a whole bag like this full of medications. And I remember two years ago we travelled, me and my wife, we weren’t married then, we went to Canada and the bag went to Austria [laughs]. We arrived in Toronto and my medication, my little bag of medication were in my suitcase and it was this big. And I called my insurance company here in the UK and said “Listen I need my medications, get me in touch with my doctor, I don’t have any, any contact details to anyone because they’re all in the, in the suitcase.” And they said “We can’t do anything just try and see a local doctor.” I went to see a local doctor and he said “I can’t give you anything, I just can’t, just can’t prescribe you with anything.” I said “Listen I’ve got a heart disease,” you know I showed him my scar, you know the scar, the operation scar, “And I have to take these medications,” and it was, it took them think five days to get me the suitcase, the suitcase. It went to Austria instead of Toronto, I don’t know why, for some reason. And those five days I didn’t do anything because you know I didn’t have the medication and I didn’t do any, any activities, any physical activities, not even walking you know because I was a bit concerned that anything can happen without having medications around you. All that I could buy from the local chemis; was aspirins because you don’t need prescriptions to buy them [laughs].

It’s actually made a great difference to our travelling, the illness. We were never great at going, weve never been one for going on holiday going abroad because we have birds and dogs and fish and, until recently, rabbits. When we did go our sons actually looked after them but now they’ve both moved away, it’s much more difficult. So wed never go away for more than a week in the past and I suppose over the last 4 years never more than a couple of days or even less than that’

So it’s actually made us very worried about being away and even going to conferences or courses, I actually went on a conference once and actually became ill there and had to be brought home. So now I can’t go out to a conference where you have to stay overnight. My mentor is now, one of great mentors in nursing older people, is now Professor of Nursing in Northern Ireland and asks me over frequently, to perhaps share my experiences of person-centred caring and you know, individual care for people, and I can’t go because I just can’t take the risk of being away;

Being away from home, being away from my husband, being away from my local GP, being away from local consultants and from my local hospital – I’m just, were just… my husband possibly more than me, much too scared! Weve actually talked about moving house, wed actually like to move down towards the South Coast but it’s not just moving away from our family, it’s moving away from all our support links;

Wed been to Turkey twice a year for the last 6 or 7 years or, if not, holidays abroad; But the moment I was diagnosed, a year gone Christmas, I just don’t feel like going anywhere in case I’m poorly when I’m there or in case you need’ I know some of the places abroad are excellent but it’s just in your own home you can be poorly and you feel as it you’re a bit better being at home. But I think if you’re abroad and you’re poorly, you feel worse to start with. Well that’s my opinion, anyway;

(This interview was conducted in Punjabi and the transcript translated into English.)

After that I went to America. I discussed it with the doctor and told him that I’d really like to go, my son and grandchildren are there, and when my son learnt I was in hospital he kept on phoning because he was very worried too and wanted to visit me. He asked if he should come over but I said, ‘No, don’t you come over, theres no need. I’ll come to America by myself. From this side I’ll be very well looked after. The nurses were told everything and the flight attendants and they really looked after me;

Did a nurse go with you;

No, no, there were only the airline people, their staff took care of me. So I got to America and my family had me checked out by a doctor there. And the doctor said that I was taking the correct medications and that I would have to take them for the rest of my life. I told him that with the medications I do seem to be a lot better. And in America I generally stayed in the house, I carried on taking the medicines and I stayed there a month, just less than a month. And I came back here because there my healthcare was extremely expensive and so I didn’t want to stay. I wasn’t registered there either, nothing, it was all done privately by my son;;;

Oh and another thing about having the ICD it is possible to obtain information when you are going on holiday where the specialist clinics are that can deal with my particular device.

ICDs?

Yes. And I will be ringing the specialist nurse shortly because, if I can’t find it on the website because she has told me the route to find it on the website [ha] and I can, I am going to Spain and Portugal for a holiday and I will be able to find out where the specialist centres are near where we are going to be so that if I have a problem, you know, I’ll have a sheet of paper that I can give to the doctor, the, anybody who is dealing with me and say, Look this is where my device is, can be dealt with. And they can phone up and get advice.

Ok

So that and in this country obviously I’d refer them to the specialist hospital I deal with and I’m sure that every A&E in the country knows where their nearest ICD centre is.

And what happens with your monitor when you go abroad? Do you take it with you? Do you plug it into a phone?

No I don’t, no I don’t bother. I could but then I’d have to register to a new phone number and quite honestly, you know, for two weeks at a time I’ll take my chances.

Ok.

Yeah I mean if, if it was giving a lot of problems then I might have to resort to taking it with me and setting it, but when you are on a coach tour staying in a different hotel every couple of nights it’s going to be an awful lot of work and I’m not that confident that I’d get it all set up properly before I moved on somewhere else.