I didn’t really understand what was really going on. But like I started, when they sort of explained to me I just started crying because I just, I just didn’t realise what I was doing to myself. And to that it makes you realise, I was like, “What? I’m doing that?” I just didn’t, it was just like the realisation of what I was actually doing cos to me it didn’t seem like anything. Oh I’m just selling my lunch. Didn’t really seem like much. But to be put like in the context they put it, I was like, “Oh.” ‘Cos I just didn’t, ‘cos I was only like 14.
And to find something like that is just like a shock. I was like, okay; I just didn’t really understand what was going on. And it’s like sort of a bit of a weird feeling to, thing to understand. It was just like “What?” I was just like, “Uh?” A realisation was just like you just didn’t, I didn’t quite know what to think.
And did they mention eating disorders do you remember, or did they actually give you a diagnosis at that point?
They said there was like, mentioned there was like something wrong like I was having trouble eating and they referred me to, like, not a, sort of like a clinic but not like an in-patient clinic to get like counselling and that, but they didn’t say, they didn’t like say, “Oh yeah, Anorexic.” Or something like that. It waited, I got in the car with my Mum and I turned around and said, “Does that mean I’m anorexic?” And she said, “Yeah.” And I just went and I just lost, I completely broke down ‘cos I just didn’t, putting that name to it sort of like shocked that, and I was like, I just didn’t, that’s just not what I thought I was doing. I just did not put that to what I was doing.