What I have said to people is about Covid is about being aware of, more so older people, because I can see how people were…I think I left it too long to go to hospital. And when I know people have got it, so when some of my staff had it, I was checking in with them every day, how are you feeling, getting them to check their temperature. They’d be, oh I’ll be all right tomorrow. No, no, because a lot of people will just ignore things. I said to people if you’re coughing and you are literally struggling to breathe you need to get hold of your GP or make sure you get somebody to look at you, because the longer you leave is the reason that you end up…to me if you get pneumonia in your lungs that’s it, you’re going to be on a ventilator. If you get in early enough that you don’t have that and you can have antibiotics or whatever they can do, give you the drugs and stuff to make it better. I’m not a doctor so I can’t say, but I think from what I’ve watched things on TV and listened to people about it and stuff and what happened to me is I think some people leave it too long.

But it affects people in a different way. Some people can feel really ill but… Actually, one of my colleagues at work he got it, he felt really bad, but he didn’t even get a cough, so it didn’t get to his chest. And then my other colleague got it and she’s still got it on her chest now really, she’s still coughing. She’s recovered but she’s still coughing, but it sounds more like a fluey cough than what you saw with me.

So, I’m telling people to be aware. And also, how easy it is, if you don’t keep your distance the chances are you’re going to get it, especially now. It is difficult because we’re human beings, we don’t like no human contact and stuff, just like me, so it is really difficult. None of us like wearing masks. It’s hard. But people just need to be aware it’s real.

And do the two of you, would you say you have a message for other people about ICU and Covid and recovery perhaps?

Yeah, it’s not always easy. But, if you get through the intensive care, to me that’s the door opening to the rest of your life, isn’t it? And recovery from any major illness is awful. I think you’ve just got to talk about it, be honest about it, say when you feel crap, when you feel bad or you’re having a bad day. My husband still does not, where he still has dreams, he has a lot of problems sleeping. So, we try everything to try and help him sleep. And then, you know, he has a lot of dreams, that sometimes he finds disturbing, but he tells me about them, we talk about it, and I think that’s the best thing.

Yeah, appreciate the staff, you know. And that’s not just people who have been in ICU. I think generally, patients don’t realise just how difficult it is being in hospital. And particularly I think if you’re in ICU at the moment and you see so many people die. And I really picked that up from the number of ICU staff who wanted to come and see me because I was their miracle, I was their one who had survived against the odds. And that gave them hope, I think. So, I think for patients, yeah, appreciate the staff, be grateful for what they’re doing. Because even if you think they’re doing a rubbish job, 99 per cent of the time they’re doing the very best they can. And even when they’re not doing the very best they can, they’re doing their job, you know. Some people are overdoing their job. I think I would say 90 per cent of the staff I worked with are doing more than they should…could…than would be reasonably expected for what they’re paid.

Is there anything like a message you’d like to give to other people who’ve been to…you’d like to tell other people about intensive care and Covid?

There’s so many things you could say, isn’t there, I don’t know, I just…I think it’s horrible, but I think, you know, with all the support and everyone around you, you can…and you’ve got to be positive. You can get through anything, can’t you, and you know, like I said to you earlier, my puzzle was completely scattered, but everything was there, and it’s all piecing it back together, and my puzzle’s got a long way to go, but it’s nearly there, and that’s only three months, and you know, a few days ago I had a few bits of my puzzle gone again, but they’re slowly going back, and I think it’s just going to take time, and that’s what you’ve got to give yourself, is time, and we don’t give ourselves enough time, do we? That’s the problem. We just don’t, and we need to, and it does take time. But yeah.

How do you do it, give yourself time?

I don’t know, I don’t honestly know. It just…you’ve got to not be hard, you see. I gave myself different goals and achievements and I always would speak to my husband or kids and anyone, and they’d look at them and go like is that achievable, and then I’d usually re-evaluate them and have a look and go, no, maybe not actually, but that’s what I wanted to do. I wanted to do that but wanting and being able are two very different things, so I’d give myself that goal of walking that three or four houses down, where my original goal would have been, we’ve got a post box, I’m getting to the post box. That wouldn’t have been achievable, but it’s what I wanted, and there’s a big difference, isn’t there? What you want and what you can achieve, and if you set your goals too high, you’re going to fail, so you’ve got to be realistic. Yeah.

It’s not easy.

No.

Is there anything you would like to tell other people about intensive care and Covid, now that you’ve been through it all? As you’re now an expert.

Oh, I don’t think so. Well, my main thing is, is if you haven’t been jabbed, please get jabbed, it’s the only way that really is going to save your life. That Covid experience for me, I don’t know how it affects other people, but for me it was long, it was traumatic, it was on the pinnacle of me dying, a few times. I would say, probably, never give up, keep, you know, trying to go forward as best as you can, but take one day at a time. Because every day that’s…if you can get through one day you can get through a next, but you’ve got to take it on a daily basis. Because with the long Covid is that you can develop all sorts of different things, and you have to try and battle them one at a time as best as you can. And always, if you’re never sure, just ask the experts, phone your doctor, get as much information as you can and tell them clearly what you’re going through, it doesn’t matter if it seems silly. I mean for me when I was experiencing different things that I didn’t say at the time when I probably should have so the doctor could make a better diagnosis of what I was experiencing. Because to me everything I’ve experienced since I just put down to the Covid and that’s what people go through; when really, I probably should have asked the doctors or the nurses, or whatever.

What would be your message for staff?

I think my first message would just be thank you. That’s the first thing. Just thank you for fighting so hard. I think my other message would be…because I know how hard it is for them, there’s a story called the Starfish Story. It’s a very short one and it’s my message for all nurses is, there was a boy walking along the beach. And a man was following him, and the man saw this boy bending down every so often. And the beach was absolutely littered with starfish, and they were going to die because the sun was coming up. And every now and again, the boy would bend down, pick up a starfish and throw it back into water, where it would be safe.

And the man was really puzzled by this and eventually he caught the boy up and he said to him, what are you doing? And the boy said, I’m throwing the starfish back because otherwise they’re going to die. And the man said, but there’s thousands of starfish on this beach, you can’t make any difference. And the boy bent down, picked a starfish up, threw it back and said, I made a difference to that one.

And that’s what I want the nurses to know. They made a difference to this one. They can’t…they just can’t save everyone because it’s such an impossible situation. And they can’t do everything for every patient. But all the nurses and healthcare assistants and doctors and physios and OTs, everyone in the hospital made a difference to me in a positive way at some point. And I am so grateful for that.

Do you remember any staff in particular from the ICU?

Yeah, I do, I do, one which shouldn’t work there at all. She terrified me, really terrified me. She was…and it’s horrible to say, she was a horrible lady, and that’s one of the reasons that I didn’t think I was going to make it out, because of how she treated me, and that’s… yeah, she was awful, really awful. And then I can’t remember the nurse’s name in the evening, who gave me the iPad and told me to phone my family, do you know what, he was a lifesaver, absolutely changed everything for me. And I tried to find out who he was, just to say to him…he didn’t do anything above and beyond what any normal human being would have done. It was just the one thing of…and he didn’t even talk to me really nicely as in like, oh…or like that, he was just like, phone your family. Phone your family, look, I’ll go and get something and phone your family, really matter of fact, really bang, bang, just like, you know, well, what’s the problem love, phone your family, sort of thing.

And he did, he brought it out and then he just kept coming over to me and…I mean, I think they only looked after two patients. He was looking after me and this man that had been on the ventilator for ages, and he said to me, oh, your…he said, it’s a good job he’s asleep, he said, because you’re going to take up a lot of my time. And he was really funny and nice, but…and he just…he was brilliant, but like I say, he didn’t do anything, and he probably would not have any memory of me, because what he did was just so normal, but it was really nice.

So once I started doing it, yes, it was pretty hard the first few times but once you start getting into it and get your appetite back, the hospital and my local NHS had sent a load of these amazing shakes which were so full of nutrients and god knows what, I was drinking two of those a day, just cramming myself full of nutrients and extra protein and stuff like that to try and kickstart my muscle mass coming back. I looked at myself in the mirror and my legs were just like two poles. It’s amazing how quickly your muscle just falls away. So I’d lost all my muscle mass but like I said, after six weeks by mid-July, end July I was feeling pretty good, well enough to go to Cornwall and take in some sun, have a bit of a laugh and, yes, ever since then I’ve renewed my love for being fit, decided that although I still feel, I don’t know what the correct term for it is but I would just say, slightly chesty, you know, there’s always a bit of congestion in my chest and I think that the exercise is good to get rid of that.

So that’s when I decided that I would get a new mountain bike and I would do this challenge. It was something that I always wanted to do but to give myself a target, to make it 31 March which was the day that I was put into an induced coma last year to be actually on the South Downs cycling a hundred miles on 13,000ft of elevation is a good way to say to Covid, you know, stuff you, but also a good way to say to the guys at [hospital], thank you, you know. It’s a credit to you that I’m well enough today to do that. It was the care that was given then, that I’m reaping the benefits of now. It’s a very strange way to look at it but I think it’s a good kick up the arse for me to realise just how precious life is and, yes, not to be squandered.

…since I did that JustGiving site for this cycle ride, believe it or not, I’m raising money for the hospital and some of the people who have donated are nurses that looked after me which has totally blown my mind.