Isabelle - Interview 42
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Isabelle’s mother was a state enrolled nurse who was 60 when she first developed PD. At first she lived independently but when it was no longer practical for her to live independently in her own house she moved to a flat in order to be near to one of her sons. When her son died in 2002 Isabelle who had been living in the Netherlands moved back to England with her young family and took her mother to live with her. They converted a ground floor room to a sleeping and living room with it’s own toilet facilities. Both Isabelle and her husband had full time jobs and they had to arrange for carers to some in and check on her mother during the day. They found that carers from the council were unpredictable so that her mother might not be washed and dressed till mid-day. There was always concern about falls occurring while there was no-one in the house. Although her mother had an alarm system on one occasion when she had a fall her message was misinterpreted and she lay for 5 hours unattended. After another fall when she was admitted in a very poor state to hospital they were advised to consider finding a nursing home where she could have 24 hour nursing care. They were fortunate in finding one close to their home which provided care which met their very rigorous expectations.
Isabelle is much happier now that the care her mother is getting ensures her getting the appropriate nursing attention but also provides her with a social environment which keeps her happy and occupied. Isabelle is able to visit her at least twice a week and she enjoys her visits to the family home.
She is impressed by the fact that the extent to which her disability is obvious depends very much on her mood so that when she has been engaged in an interesting encounter her walking and general demeanor change. When one of her grandchildren was unwell she suddenly became concerned just as she would have been in the days when she had been a nurse. For her grandchildren, having her in the house meant that they had to share their mother with their grandmother. Now that seeing her is more of a special event they enjoy her company as she obviously enjoys theirs.
Making the decision to allow her mother to go into a nursing home was difficult for Isabelle but she feels confident that it was the right decision for all of them.
Isabelles mothers signature had changed so much the bank would not accept it.
Isabelle remembers how impressed she was by her mothers reaction to her daughters illness.
Isabelle understood why her mother would sometimes freeze in doorways and describes how she would...
Isabelle had to be a daughter, a mother and a carer.
Some but not all of the costs of care were covered by allowances.
And if you get to the point when you actually run out of her money would it then be possible?
Well, this nursing home part of the parcel was I had to produce evidence that she had income to support her life there. What actually happens is and I asked the question when it starts to run out when you get to the threshold, then they apply to the council to so to pay. She won’t be moved out of her room and that is and that applies to all nursing homes. But I think all nursing homes have to go through that process. You have to show you have some money. I think they also, sounds funny, there must be a life expectancy number of years you can expect to have somebody there.