Yeah, because I chose to have him that way and I feel that I’ it’s quite a big, I felt like it was quite a big part of me choosing to have this caesarean anyway. And I was fully’ sort of more with it, fully aware of what was going on? this time. And I feel like that was sort of an achievement in itself. Going through, a lot of people who’ve had, who I know who’ve had normal deliveries, they’ve said, ‘Oh, you’re brave to be like knowing what it’s like and going for it again,’ and so I felt that I had more more sort of an achievement this time.

And having an election section, was that like you thought it was going to be?

I’ve watched it on sort of programmes on the tele, but it was more it’s strange actually, it was like you’re watching it through somebody else, it wasn’t’ because you’ve got no pain, you just’ I don’t know, it was a really good experience. The midwives and everything, I think they made it’ I suppose everybody’s different, but like I found that they relaxed me.

So yeah, it was a good experience.

My time to go to hospital was nine oclock in the morning and I arrived there at nine. I had hoped that it would go ahead at about eleven oclock, had been kept waiting in the maternity ward, I suppose you would call it and from nine onwards and was told that thered been some delay, that there were going to be two other little sort of minor operations before mine so I wasn’t taken away until half past twelve, one oclock. It was good because the anaesthetist came to visit me on the ward and explained everything, as did the surgeon. And they were very clear in what, in the instructions that they gave, and answering questions and queries I had, then were taken away and the delivery of the baby came at about ten past two in the afternoon so it had been quite a long wait, it had been sort of five hours after the, the original entering into hospital. So in that aspect it wasn’t particularly pleasing. However the baby was healthy and, and everything seemed to be okay and then we were back out of theatre by about three oclock and up on the ward from then on for about two days.

And what was the actual delivery like?

‘well, longer than I remember the last time. They had the, they did say to me that because it was, you know, the previous scarring it perhaps would need a little bit of extra time to stitch up, to make sure the repairs were done properly, which’ it put my mind at rest, you know, that nothing was wrong, that everything was going hopefully to plan. And they talked to me through the- more or less the procedure and certainly the staff on the, in the theatre that day, were quite relaxed and everything seemed to be very kind of easy-going. In no way was it stressful or I felt pressurised so in that way, everyone was most helpful and very good at what they were doing, I’m glad to say. [sighs] It wasn’t an experience I would like to repeat, you know, again, but if it has to be done and that’s the way I wanted it done then I understand, and they worked very professionally to see it to the end.

And was your husband with you in theatre?

Yes.

How was he?

Yes, I think he too found it very calm and very straightforward, which was good’

I think knowing, you know, that it was going to be a caesarean, in my mind, kind of helped in a way, so it wasn’t the unknown. I kind of knew what was going to happen. The experience perhaps wasn’t’ I think the first time, because I had had gas and an epidural and had taken forty hours to see if I could have the first baby, I think at that time, I was perhaps a little bit more not quite with the situation, and therefore the caesarean seemed to happen much more quickly. I mean it wasn’t an emergency caesarean, I didn’t feel it was an emergency caesarean the first time. Everything seemed to happen in a very kind of pleasant kind of atmosphere, helped by the staff in the theatre. And on this occasion, too, it was very easy-going and quite relaxed. But you just kind of felt that you were in a queue in this, in this instance, which I can understand, you know, it was one of many that were happening that day, so it was kind of’ it was just a job to be done [sighs].

Are you okay to go on?

Yes, thank you [laughs].

And to what extent, if any, did this delivery meet your expectations? Was it like you thought it was going to be?

Yes, I suppose so, yes. I mean, any surgery is not pleasant. I don’t think, you know, I don’t think you can sort of kid yourself that it’s all going to be a hunky-dory experience. And you

Well they said in the morning to get there sort of quarter to eight in the morning, so my mum and my boyfriend came with me. And we were a bit late but then we were taken into sort of a room. It was like a’ it’s in the delivery suite, but is like a different, is not the sort of room that you go in when you’ve gone into labour usually, it’s usually sort of overnight before you go into labour sort of thing. And I went in there and there was a lady had just had her caesarean next door, and they came and said that I was third on the list. So they said it should be they try and do their electives in the morning. But obviously each ones different so they could overrun and it depends how long they take. So they said roughly around half past eleven I would be going down, so I was’ then they came in, I saw an anaesthetist, she came in and was talking to me and just really sort of trying to keep me relaxed and just saying’ explaining what they’ll do and how they’ll do it, sort of because it’s different to your emergency because you actually walk down to theatre instead of being wheeled down, and they brought like a gown for me to put on. They said it’s easier if you’re ready because then we can take you straight down literally. Because they clean up obviously the theatre and then they want to take you straight down. So they’d given me a gown to put on and everything and they just said sort of you can’t eat anything or drink anything, so I was like, ‘Oh’ [sigh]. But in the end they had a lot of delays so it took right into’ I think it was about half past one I went down, because all the others, there was a few problems with them.

So’ I went down about half past one and it was’ it was completely different. They asked me what music I wanted on and it was really nice and relaxed. They were all really like sort of welcoming, they weren’t’ weren’t scary, I thought it was going to be a bit, bit sort of’ I don’t know, you expect an operating theatre to be because I didn’t really remember it from the first time, but it was quite relaxing. Then they give me my’ I had a spinal’ they gave me that, and then I went numb, and then it all seemed to happen really quickly. They said if you don’t feel well or’ then just let us know because they said your blood pressure can drop and things. And so it was, it was quite a good experience. And then he was born at sort of just before two oclock. So from the time I went down it only took sort of half an hour really before and then he was born and then I was – I was the quickest one, all the others had been in for hours, like over an hour, and it was just over fifty minutes I was in the theatre, so wasn’t very long.

Did you ever have second thoughts or change your mind at all?

I didn’t at that point, no. I also had huge pelvic pains, so, you know, it all contributed to be the right decision, if you see what I mean. Sometimes, I think the powers work like that, but I had a lot of pain, which apparently was, it’s sometimes due to if you’ve had a previous caesarean, you have scarring, so your baby’s pushing on that. And then also, he came to see me after’ we hadn’t got to that and he said, ‘You know, it’s amazing, but where your baby was’, he said ‘You’d have just struggled again. You carry them really high up, they’re not engaged’, and I said, ‘Well, would she have engaged later?’ and he said, ‘Well the thing is, looking at your anatomy, I don’t think she would’, he said, ‘You made the right decision’, so it was amazing [laughs]. So I’ve no regrets at all. So it’s some, something about the way I carry, perhaps my anatomy, the, the heads just don’t get right down in my pelvis. So he said, ‘I suspect that’s why it took so long last time, and why she just wasn’t going to come out. So, so it was amazing, so it all was the right decision. So’ [smiles].

So with that in mind, what role do you see you had in the decision this time?

Well, I made it totally, yeah, so that’s great. And, I suppose I’m lucky that it turned out to be very much the right thing and went so well. I’d say the only’ I suppose a few days, actually, to be true, the only doubt I had, had to be fair, because I did sometimes think, ‘Gosh, you know, is it unfair on’, I mean, obviously after what he said’ Sometimes in the days before, while I was in this pain, I thought, ‘Is it unfair on her, bringing her out a week early?’, I used to worry about that slightly. ‘And what if she doesn’t breathe?’ or’or whatever, but obviously now I know it was the right decision for her as well.

And did you have any reassurance from anyone at all that that would be okay, the fact that you were having her early and that you had these worries about’?

From my own obstetrician, oh yes, totally.

And you were reassured?

Totally, yeah, I was. Because even the, the morning before, I said to him, ‘I’m still worried she won’t breathe And he said, ‘Well, you know’, he again, poor man, probably had to tell me about ten times. But I mean, women are nervous, you know, I suppose I was an anxious patient, though but for perhaps good reason, so for the umpteenth time he told me that it’s very unlikely at, you know, I was in my thirty-ninth week and plus, even then he said, ‘Look, even if she does, weve got everything here, so don’t worry. So, you know, and I did feel very reassured about that, again, for the twentieth time [laughs].

So how would you say that you feel about the way that you delivered this time?

I think it went really well and I’m, I’m probably really glad I made my decision. And I’ve no regrets about the money it cost, which was a lot, and, you know, were not extremely wealthy but, you know, it was the price of a car and car versus baby is not, not a decision I have to think about.

The night before the C-section, one of the nurses came round to make sure I was all prepared. ‘Nil by mouth from midnight onwards, and they gave me a couple of little tablets, I think, to settle your stomach, so you don’t react to the anaesthetic. On the morning itself, the surgeon came and talked to me again. Hed come previously for me to sign the consent forms a couple of days previously, but he came to talk to me and so did the anaesthetist, and make sure I was all ready for it and I that I didn’t have any final questions and then my husband and I went down to the delivery suites and sat about for a little while, maybe an hour or so, whilst they were all getting ready. I had the two, I can’t remember what they’re called’ to give you blood transfusions, they put in the little pipe, the little thing ready, I can’t remember what the word is for that?

Canula?

Canula, thank you. I had canulas put into both of my hands, ready, because they were expecting a lot of blood loss, so they wanted two canulas in, ready to give me loads and loads of blood, so I was sitting there with these in my hands and trying not to look at my hands, because I’m very squeamish so from that point onwards I was like, ‘I can’t look. And then I think I actually walked into the operating theatre, all in my gown with my stockings on and my canulas in my hand, I had to sit on the edge of the bed, sit up very straight and still for the anaesthetist to put the spinal in, in my back, which didn’t take too long, and then leant back, and then they started the actual procedure. Shall I describe the procedure?

Okay, first of all, after having the spinal, or if you have an epidural it’s the same, they check that you’ve gone numb, they’re sort of pinching your toes and, and spraying something saying, ‘When do you feel this?’ and ‘When does it stop feeling cold?’ and working out, you know, that you’re totally numb where you should be. And then they put up the big screen so you can’t see anything, and you’re obviously lying on your back, and you can’t see anything sort of past mid-chest level. And the bed itself is tilted slightly to the left, which is I think so that all your innards are nicely out of the way when they chop you up. So [smiles], ‘and then they actually performed the procedure, which I ignored as much as possible. Obviously you can’t see anything and my husband was up talking to me, the anaesthetist also talks to you; they’re really nice. And you can have a CD on of your choice, just to take you mind off of it and listen to some music. A couple of minutes later, you’re presented with a baby, and it’s all bundled up. They check it, check that it’s breathing and everything and bundle it all up in a blanket and then give it to, and theres just about space for the baby to balance between your face and this, this sheet screen that’s up. So the baby’s there, and you can look at it and kiss and cuddle it and everything and that’s quite nice, and whilst they’re doing that, whilst you’re distracted with the baby then they’re delivering the placenta and stitching you back together again. So, getting the baby out is the quickest part. Once they start, then you’ve probably got a baby within ten minutes and then they’re just patching you up again, which probably takes about three quarters of an hour.