The loss of a testicle was a big thing for about a week and a half maybe. I mean at first there was this great sense of loss and particularly because your pubic hair is shaved, you've got this scar, you've got surgical dressings. I remember the scrotum just kind of hanging there and I did feel a definite sense of loss. Again I would say that really lasted for, you know, no more than 10 days or so because the, the surgical site quit causing me any problem within 2 or 3 days, and then very quickly I was moving onto chemotherapy and I had other things to worry about.
Before you go on, can you just expand a little bit about your sense of loss, was it - I don't want to put words into your mouth - in a sense of your masculinity or part of your body or…?
Well both. I mean there's this common expression, at least in North America, where you talk all the time about balls, you know, "That really took balls", or, "He's really got balls", and all of a sudden you don't have balls, you've got ball, and so there is a kind of threat at least to masculinity. It was important to me to realise very quickly that sexual function wasn't impaired at all and really that the funny thing is that once I got used to having one testicle, which was really, again, very quick, it all of a sudden seemed incredibly clunky to have two. I mean the idea of, "Well don't they bump into each other?" And they do bump into each other, and all of a sudden having one just seemed like a very natural and even sort of preferred way to go through life.