So, even though I kind of use my platform and people can see me doing like really kind of daring and out there, things and, feel like I’m super comfortable, I’m also very real with the downsides as well, like the reality of not feeling great about my scars all the time, or body image. It’s so important to show the good and the bad or the ups and the downs.

My target range, or like who I’ve thought I could inspire has always been younger people, who may have gone through something similar to me or might go through something similar, then I have. But also, I’m really surprised with a lot of older people and people, like senior to me, who’ve connected and reached out and who I meet and who’ve said like “Wow, it’s amazing what you’re doing. In my time this wasn’t a thing” or like “I hadn’t figured out support, I didn’t have like a platform like you.” So, it’s like I’m kind of bridging the gap between the two as well, of like people who had maybe less treatment or less opportunities to talk about their scars or see someone who looked like me, and now young people who really enjoy and, take inspiration from seeing someone like me so accessible and they can reach to me and DM [direct message], stuff like that.

I realised that it makes me kind of unique and different, and it’s opened so many doors, it’s enabled me to connect to people on a deeper level and help people and help younger people than me, who are at an age where they understand their scars and may have had traumatic experiences surrounding it and live in a world where they have access to different images constantly, which can affect their cognitive and their self-esteem and social anxiety. So, I really use my platform now to try to combat those negative thoughts and really show a different society and how you can live with scars, but you can be proud about it and do amazing things, which society, and which sometimes people don’t think they can do. Or, are a bit shy because of their body looks different to everybody else’s.

So that’s where I kind of stand on it but, as I said again, I have to realise that my scars are different placement, different textures, different skin tones. I have to navigate them differently to a lot of people we all have to. So, when I think of my scars happening to me it’s something which I wouldn’t change just because of the opportunities and the connections I’ve made with my scars, which hasn’t hindered who I am today and who I want to be.

Yeah, so my burn was rather different, because as the only visible burn that was on my body was on my right side of my face, that was near my right earlobe going into my right cheek and my right neck, so it wasn’t as… I would say maybe visibly obvious to, a lot of people. So, I wasn’t ever … it wasn’t ever a massive talking topic or issue when it came to schools, especially like secondary school, and primary school as well.

So… and also, my burn, after a certain age and time didn’t often … didn’t restrict a lot of my movements. So, I was able to do a lot of things like physical education, writing. So, it wasn’t a massive hindrance for me in school. …Possibly due to when it happened, so it had time to kind of change and evolve and adjust to my body. …And, as I said again, it wasn’t much of a kind of – from my knowledge – a talking topic or an issue, going to school, secondary… primary and secondary.

I think going through, growing up and going through life I’ve always been very self-conscious of showing my scars in intimate settings or surroundings  and often like, leaving my top on and stuff like that and things of that nature, and I just think nowadays I think being who I am and it not being avoidable, and things like that, is just kind of maybe mentioning it and just be like hey, if you do obviously, or someone does see or something, “Oh well, yeah, I’ve got a scar” or something like that. And just not making it a big deal. And I think that’s come with experience and time and who I am as a person. I am still very kind of, I can still be very introverted I can still be very insecure and shy. I think a lot of people misconstrued me being on social media being a loud character. That is part of me but then another part of me is I’m a human, I do get insecure about how I look and my body, even though I advocate not to, it’s a roller coaster, but I definitely mention it and nine times out of, well, yeah, pretty much nine times out of well nine times out of ten, even 10 out of 10 it hasn’t been an issue.

So, if I’m opening up about something that’s super vulnerable, I don’t expect anything back, but I do expect a sort of maybe like, do you really understand me? Because if I want to, if I’m going to pursue something with somebody, I do want someone who’s really going to like maybe have gone through something similar or might have a similar experience so we can really like then built a balance to each other like I can’t, I don’t think personally it would work for me, being with someone who’s maybe a bit superficial or someone who has never been, who might not have had an experience of being with someone who, or themselves have gone through something, or on the journey themselves.

So, I went to look … explore that route in my self-care journey and understanding who I was, and my scars journey, and I actually went to a practitioner, and she saw my scars on my chest and my body and she said she wouldn’t operate on them or do anything or camouflage. She said that I should – if I wanted to – add tattoos to my scarring, since they’re legacy scars, since they’ve been so long on my body, to enhance the fact. And she really said she loved the kind of texture and the story of the scars and what it brought. So, for me that was a turning point and in that moment I realised that my scars were beautiful, and they have power, and I can use it to create good and really enhance my journey rather than kind of hide away. But I didn’t begin the journey to hide away, I began it to do self-care but through the journey I found like a power and deeper meaning in it.