Well they said in the morning to get there sort of quarter to eight in the morning, so my mum and my boyfriend came with me. And we were a bit late but then we were taken into sort of a room. It was like a’ it’s in the delivery suite, but is like a different, is not the sort of room that you go in when you’ve gone into labour usually, it’s usually sort of overnight before you go into labour sort of thing. And I went in there and there was a lady had just had her caesarean next door, and they came and said that I was third on the list. So they said it should be they try and do their electives in the morning. But obviously each ones different so they could overrun and it depends how long they take. So they said roughly around half past eleven I would be going down, so I was’ then they came in, I saw an anaesthetist, she came in and was talking to me and just really sort of trying to keep me relaxed and just saying’ explaining what they’ll do and how they’ll do it, sort of because it’s different to your emergency because you actually walk down to theatre instead of being wheeled down, and they brought like a gown for me to put on. They said it’s easier if you’re ready because then we can take you straight down literally. Because they clean up obviously the theatre and then they want to take you straight down. So they’d given me a gown to put on and everything and they just said sort of you can’t eat anything or drink anything, so I was like, ‘Oh’ [sigh]. But in the end they had a lot of delays so it took right into’ I think it was about half past one I went down, because all the others, there was a few problems with them.

So’ I went down about half past one and it was’ it was completely different. They asked me what music I wanted on and it was really nice and relaxed. They were all really like sort of welcoming, they weren’t’ weren’t scary, I thought it was going to be a bit, bit sort of’ I don’t know, you expect an operating theatre to be because I didn’t really remember it from the first time, but it was quite relaxing. Then they give me my’ I had a spinal’ they gave me that, and then I went numb, and then it all seemed to happen really quickly. They said if you don’t feel well or’ then just let us know because they said your blood pressure can drop and things. And so it was, it was quite a good experience. And then he was born at sort of just before two oclock. So from the time I went down it only took sort of half an hour really before and then he was born and then I was – I was the quickest one, all the others had been in for hours, like over an hour, and it was just over fifty minutes I was in the theatre, so wasn’t very long.

So how do you feel about the way that this baby was born?

Brilliant, I feel differently actually than with’ with [child’s name] I felt, I just felt’ after I felt ill and I felt like I’d failed. And I was quite, it got me quite down actually. But this time I was sort of’ I couldn’t believe how well I felt, I felt, like I felt too well, that I was going to’ I was panicking that I was feeling too well really and that I was a lot more I don’t know, it just felt the way I would expect you to feel after you’ve had a baby, I felt this time. Unlike last time I didn’t, I didn’t feel’ you’re supposed to be happy when you’ve had a baby, but the first time I didn’t. But this time I was just’ it was really, really nice, it was a good experience.

And you said a little bit about the differences between having the emergency and the elective can you tell me a little bit more about how they’re different?

I found that with the emergency you’re because you’re so’ I think if you’re in labour anyway you’re tired, you’re just’ I had pain relief before that as well so I felt a bit sick and I just didn’t feel myself. And I feel because you don’t get that choice, it’s just, ‘You’ve got to have it’, and that’s that, I just felt depressed I think about that. And I didn’t feed, like after I had [child’s name] I didn’t breast feed, this time I did. Only for two weeks, but’ and I felt that, because I had that choice to do that. With the emergency, because I felt so ill I didn’t want to, I just, I felt like I found it harder to bond with him I think more so.

Obviously with the emergency [caesarean] you don’t have a choice at all, I felt like I made quite a big’ I could have if I wanted to go for a trial of labour I could have. The consultant never said, ‘Well you’ve got to have a caesarean, theres no choice. That was my decision to have the caesarean.

And how realistic do you think it is to encourage women to have more of a choice now?

I think, yeah it is’ it’s not that, it’s women I think now they feel like if they don’t’ I felt, like I would have felt if I would have not been given the choice, they said, ‘Right, you’ve got to have a caesarean,’ I probably would have felt worse because I’d have thought, “Well I got that choice taken away from me the first time, I want the choice the second time.”

But obviously they told me now that obviously if I have any more then I’ve got’ they wouldn’t give me a choice anymore.

If you were to give a message to other women now who are making this decision, what do you think you would tell them?

Just that everybody’s different and depending on your personal circumstances and why you’ve had a previous section and why? Things like that. Don’t just look and say, ‘Right, I’m going to have another [section]. Just take time and just let yourself sort of look into things and get as much information as you can, because it does help a lot. Well, it helped me.

So what do you think your role was in the decision making about the delivery, because the first time you didn’t have that choice with the first birth?

No, I feel like I had a lot more sort of choice in this one, a lot more I don’t know, I just felt more informed. I think because you’ve got no choice you feel worse because you feel like you’ve failed. This time it was my decision to do that, and when you’ve got people some people did look and say, ‘Oh well, wouldn’t you want to have a normal labour, wouldn’t you like to try for a normal labour?’ And at the end of the day I think if you’ it’s what you feel happy with, so’ and I did feel happy with it… So yeah, I was quite

So how do you feel about the way that this baby was born?

Brilliant, I feel differently actually than with’ with [child’s name] I felt, I just felt’ after I felt ill and I felt like I’d failed. And I was quite, it got me quite down actually. But this time I was sort of’ I couldn’t believe how well I felt, I felt, like I felt too well, that I was going to’ I was panicking that I was feeling too well really and that I was a lot more I don’t know, it just felt the way I would expect you to feel after you’ve had a baby, I felt this time. Unlike last time I didn’t, I didn’t feel’ you’re supposed to be happy when you’ve had a baby, but the first time I didn’t. But this time I was just’ it was really, really nice, it was a good experience.

Yeah, because I chose to have him that way and I feel that I’ it’s quite a big, I felt like it was quite a big part of me choosing to have this caesarean anyway. And I was fully’ sort of more with it, fully aware of what was going on? this time. And I feel like that was sort of an achievement in itself. Going through, a lot of people who’ve had, who I know who’ve had normal deliveries, they’ve said, ‘Oh, you’re brave to be like knowing what it’s like and going for it again,’ and so I felt that I had more more sort of an achievement this time.

And having an election section, was that like you thought it was going to be?

I’ve watched it on sort of programmes on the tele, but it was more it’s strange actually, it was like you’re watching it through somebody else, it wasn’t’ because you’ve got no pain, you just’ I don’t know, it was a really good experience. The midwives and everything, I think they made it’ I suppose everybody’s different, but like I found that they relaxed me.

So yeah, it was a good experience.

Do you think there are any benefits to using this kind of programme generally?

Yeah, I think it all depends on why you’re what type of person’ I think all people are different, I think that it’ especially like the computer way I think. Because computers now, people are always using them, I think it’s the easy way and people find it more instead of sitting there reading through books and things like that, I think the computer makes it more accessible really now. And it easy, it is really easy to use I would say.

Could you see there be any harm to using something like that, any problems?

Not really. Some people worry, don’t they, more, and like facts and figures can worry people. Like when they say like they do say like sort of how many people have major complications and things with the caesarean. That could scare some people, but I think I’d rather know than not know, than people say ‘Oh, you’ll be fine and then something does go wrong.

I would probably say like this research, like asking people, instead of just going by what doctors say and things like that, I think people who have been through it their self, I think they’re probably the best sort of’ because everyones different and everyone has different sort of experiences with things, and I think that’s the only way they’re going to sort of give I think women would probably listen more to people who’ve been through it themselves than doctors who just’ I know they’re medical people, but I think it’s more important to listen to people, I’d probably has listened, obviously with your study as well it was more sort of about women who’ve had things, so I think that’s why I listened to it more myself.