She felt under the weather;, tired, had a feeling of fullness and period-type pain in her lower abdomen. She would feel that she needed to go to the toilet but that her muscles would not respond. When these symptoms did not pass, she visited her GP three times, and was told it could be a grumbling appendix or pelvic inflammatory disease. She was eventually given a blood test, but while waiting for the results she was in increasing pain, and was admitted to hospital with a blocked bowel. She had surgery and a small piece of bowel was removed and sent for a biopsy, and this showed that ovarian cancer cells were present. Her oncologist recommended a hysterectomy prior to starting chemotherapy, and this was conducted three weeks later. It was confirmed that she had a stage 3/4 cancer which could not be removed as it was too firmly attached to her bladder and bowel. She felt shocked at the diagnosis and that she was carried away on a huge wave; of agreeing to treatment. She does not feel she was given the choice not to have chemotherapy, but she would have accepted anyway. She felt that she did not have enough information given to her at times. She read an article in a newspaper that described ovarian cancer as being like lots of little rice crispies; rather than one large tumour, which she found helped her understand it. She found telling her Mum and son about her diagnosis hard. Her elderly mother was particularly anxious and she found managing her fears particularly difficult to deal with. Her friends were incredibly supportive, as was her husband. She feels that he is still quite tense, and can find it difficult to let her do things herself when she is well.

Three weeks after her surgery she had her first course of chemotherapy. She found that Cancerbackup (since merged with Macmillan) provided useful information on the different chemotherapy drugs, and the hospital-based help centre offered valuable support. At the beginning of her treatment she had thought that she would be able to go back to work, and reflects that this was partly a coping strategy. She realised during her treatment that she would not feel able to return to work, so retired on medical grounds. Accepting this was difficult. Her treatment was successful but she had a recurrence of the cancer two years later. She has had four recurrences in total and two bowel operations. Of the chemotherapy drugs she has received (carboplatin, cisplatin, Taxol and caelyx), she found that caelyx gave her the fewest side effects. Her doctor told her to listen to her body, and it was she who alerted her oncologist to the fact that her cancer had returned. At the time of interview, she is currently part way through her fifth course of chemotherapy. She has kept a diary of the symptoms and side effects she has experienced during treatment. She lost weight and found her thin appearance more upsetting than losing her hair. She became anaemic during chemotherapy and had a blood transfusion which made her feel unwell. She now has Eprex injections to boost her red blood cells. She found it frightening when her check-up appointments became less frequent, and it took her time to accept that not every pain she had meant that the cancer was recurring.

She found the staff she came into contact with helpful and very kind, and offered her on-going support. She was offered a course of reiki, which she found relaxing, and she started to take maitake mushrooms, which she still continues to take. She says that she and her husband enjoy life more now than they did before she had cancer, and are more spontaneous in doing things. She enjoys going on holiday but likes to be reasonably close to home. She has accepted that she has a recurrent cancer and finds her spirituality a source of comfort. She believes it is vital not to give in; and to continue getting up each morning and keep on going. She is happy not knowing her prognosis at the moment. She does not want to feel like a victim, and encourages people not to treat her or others as such. She has campaigned to a national newspaper about the use of the word cancer; and its casual usage to denote something dirty or unpleasant. She encourages women to listen to their bodies and not to be fobbed off; by doctors attributing symptoms to their age or stress, for example. She urges people to be persistent with their GP if they are feeling unwell.