I’ve been on it [HRT] eight years now and I’m too scared to come off it now [laughs]. I must admit I am on the dual one as well which of course I get a bleed but the thing is I don’t want to come off it because basically I’m quite healthy and I don’t know what I’d be like off it. And because depression was one of the things I had during my menopause, very low, very weepy and I feel so, a lot better on it although I put weight on. But I am quite happy on it. I don’t know how long I can stay on it;

And I got to the stage where I was crying, you know. The children were at home then, the kids were at home and I must have been in my late forties when I started my change, under fifty. And I was getting to the stage where everything, if I dropped something I’d burst into tears and they all sat one Sunday lunch and said "whas wrong with you", you know and I just said "I don’t know".

It wasn’t so much, I do, I did get the hot flushes but it was the, I got panic attacks as well. I stopped driving, I had terrible panic attacks, I couldt drive, in fact I don’t drive still. And I got dreadful, I couldt go out the house. I got terrible panic attacks and in the end I went back to the GP and she, a few years later, I don’t know how long after, well it must be, anyway it was still that first practice and she put me on it. And I’ve never looked back since;

So, while you were having these symptoms were you able to talk to anybody or did you feel isolated or were there people you could talk to, other women or;

I don’t think I did that, you just go through it I think, you know. You just talk to yourself and try and pull yourself together but it’s very hard when you cat describe to someone why you cry and why you feel fed up and why you get these sudden horrible panic attacks where you don’t want to do anything. But I mean I don’t have anything like that now, and that’s why I’m staying on it.

So if someone was going to ask you what were your reasons for attending, because you go every three years, what would your personal reasons be?

Because it’s better to be safe than sorry. To make sure that there is nothing that, perhaps you cat feel a lump or anything and it’s further in, and to make sure that yore healthy because the longer you leave it the worse it is for anyone surely;

What would you say to women who don’t attend for screening?

I think that they’re very unwise, especially in this day and age where there is so much knowledge and obviously cancer treatment is getting better I believe. I’m fortunate not to have any cancer treatment, but, and it would be, it would be so quick to help them and get sorted out;

I mean women should know that it’s nothing to be afraid of, it’s something that is for their benefit actually.

Has it ever been painful?

I think yes because I think that at certain times of the month because of my age, I’m still on HRT and I do get tender breasts. This time I wasn’t, and I do get, I do have periods still so, and I havet got, I think I’d planned it. When the letter came I changed the appointment because I couldt go to the first one and I planned the next one to make sure that I hadt got this tenderising of my breasts, so I was fine;

So you tried to make the appointment for a date after a period or before?

Yes, it’s something like that, and after I’d finished one, so it was fine. It didn’t hurt, not at all. Because I do get slightly tender breasts still, even though I feel silly at my age [laughs];

Did you have them before as well?

Oh yes I had it before I went through my change yes, yeah. So I suppose on those times I didn’t realise that was what was causing the tenderness more than anything. If yore building up to a period time, that your breasts will hurt more, being squashed in the machine, yeah. But it’s nothing, it’s over so quickly, yeah;

How long did it take before you get the results;

I think between fourteen and twenty-one days.

So while yore waiting for the results do you ever think about the letter or the results or not at all;

I did this time with my doctor saying, and this thing that came out about HRT and breast cancer you know, and if yore on the dual one yore more likely to get it. And I did think this time am I going to be lucky still and it was lovely to get the letter, I thought oh yippee you know, saying I was clear you know.

What did that letter actually say?

Oh I’ve thrown it away.

that’s okay. Is it clear or do you ever think I’m not sure what this means?

Oh yes it’s clear, it says I’m not required you know, and wll see you kind of in three years time, so you know that everything was alright.

Have you ever, throughout the years, had any queries or questions or concerns?

No, I was called back once, oh I don’t know how, my husband was still alive, and I had to go back for a second one and that did panic me. But they said they weren’t sure whether it was just a normal part of my breast or whether it was unusual. But on looking back they said it was fine and I’ve been fine ever since. So I’ve never had to be called back again.

So you had the mammogram and then you had a letter saying?

Saying could I go for another one, and that does give you a slight panic. You think oh dear, you know. And I had to go back for the second one but the letter came back saying it was normal;

So they just re-took the mammogram;

Yes, yes;;

I’ve never really looked and you can get, I mean any chemist shop has got leaflets in, any doctos has got leaflets in. I mean I see all the leaflets and I think well if I want them I’d pick them up. I mean my local chemist has all, you know a rack with leaflets for all complaints, breast cancer and everything, yes.

So maybe your first experience may have been when you got your very first letter?

Yes I suppose so, yes.

When was that;

I suppose it must have been fourteen years ago because I cat remember what year it was; I’m sixty-four now so it must have been then;

At the age of fifty?

I presume so, I don’t know, I cat remember [laughs];

Do you remember getting the letter at all;

No, no, it’s just something that happens every three years as far as I’m concerned you know, so I cat really tell you what happened then;

Can you remember the very first mammogram?

No, unfortunately not. I only remember the last one, you know;

The last one, which was?

Early in August wasn’t it.

Yes; What happened there?

Well nothing particularly, I just arrived and waited and went in and in and out and that’s it, you know. theres nothing particularly memorable, just seems to me a normal thing that I do every three years.

Every three years, yove always attended?

Yes, yes.