I know it’s very difficult to compare the experiences, but how did this delivery compare to the caesarean section the first time?

I think they’re just so different, because the caesarean, with [son’s name] it was an emergency C-section so I didn’t, you know, I didn’t know that I was going to have the baby that day, I didn’t, I hadn’t had any Braxton Hicks contractions, I hadn’t felt any, I never felt contractions at all with him. And when I went in they said, ‘Oh, you know, you’re one to two centimetres dilated’ and I hadn’t felt anything, [laughs] So I was in very, very early labour and then yeah, as I say, I was, you know rushed in and had’ that was it, you know it was done. So it was quick and’ I didn’t feel tired or, there wasn’t any waiting. And I was surprised with that how quickly you do, you do get up and about. I mean, obviously yeah, you’ve got a scar and you’ve got to be careful but you know, considering that you’ve had a major operation and you’ve had, you know, you can’t walk because you’ve got the spinal block and catheter and everything, you know, you’re very quickly in the bath and walking around and stuff and encouraged to do that. So, although you’ve got to be careful because of the scar, it’s not like you’re in bed for a few weeks.

And this one, there was all the sort of trauma beforehand, the waiting and a lot of pain, because obviously with a caesarean as well, you’ve got the pain relief for the operation and afterwards they make sure you’ve got, you know, I was on painkillers for six weeks so I didn’t actually feel any pain’ when I came home. Because they’re more aware that you might be in pain. So, you know, with this delivery there was a lot of pain before, apart from the, you know, the actual delivery and you sort of aren’t offered much pain relief because you have had a natural delivery. And obviously I was in pain with the breastfeeding so I was on a lot of painkillers for that in the end, as well. But that’s not, not to do with the actual delivery.

And in terms of the recovery, because you had such a long labour, that was the majority of a week, how long do you think it took you to feel your normal self again after?

Oh, quite quickly, although I mean, I was in hospital until the Sunday lunchtime and I wanted to come home then. Because I had thought that I’d want to spend sort of, you know, because you could obviously come out quickly if you had a natural birth sometimes, and it’s all fine. But I thought, ‘Oh, I’d like to spend a bit of time in hospital because I want to get to know [daughter’s name], you know, and let [son’s name] be at home and not have to worry about it so much, because he can’t see it. And, but then I really wanted to get home [laughs]. So I was like, ‘Oh no, I’ve got to wait ’til the Sunday, until they take the catheter out.

And if you were to give a message to other women that were making the decision about how to deliver the second time, what message would you send to other women?

Yeah, get as much information as possible, and definitely have a plan, but then, like you always have to be with this business, you know, you have to be really open minded to it’you know, and you really do. You can’t like have your heart set on, ‘I really want to experience a natural birth’ and to be honest, I’d say it’s not the be all and end all. I don’t really feel that I’m a better person, you know, and I don’t feel, you know, that shes a better baby or anything because I had a natural birth.

And if you were to give a message to the health professionals that give information to women who are planning a second delivery what information do you think health professionals should be providing, what message would you send to them?

I think they need to, what, for the second time, you mean? I think, yeah, they need to remember that you know, you’ve had a C-section so you might need a bit more… If you are going to try for a natural birth, you might need a bit more information about that, because as a second time mum you’re sort of thought, you know, you don’t see the midwives as often and you have one, and you could ask to go to the normal ante-natal classes, but usually you have one, if you’re lucky, you know, to meet other second time mums. But you know, you might want a bit more information about labour and pain relief and things if you didn’t experience it the first time.

To be honest, I felt like a lot of it was left down to me, you know, even when I went to see the consultant. He didn’t sort of say, ‘Right, this is what were going to do with you and this is how it’s going to be. Even their attitude was you know, ‘What do you want to do?. And I think if I hadn’t have had the information already on board, because I already had seen your program when I saw the consultant, if I hadn’t had all that information, I might have felt a bit sort of overwhelmed by that’ you know, that much choice sort of thing’ not knowing, not knowing what was involved.

I went in Tuesday night and that was Wednesday morning. And then my husband came in and I was getting on and off painful contractions but, you know, they’d come and they’d be quite regular and then they’d go away again so’ It was getting quite painful and I can’t remember whether it was Wednesday or Thursday that I’d had the strongest pain tablets they could give me and then I had Pethidine on that ward, because that was the most they could give me. And they were still talking about sending me home, even though my waters had broken and I was in pain. I said, ‘Theres no way I can go home like this. I can’t cope with the. They were just so painful and I was on this antenatal ward and other people were there, you know, because they were having tests or something early in pregnancy, and theres me having these contractions trying not to be noisy in the middle of the night, you know, while I’m in pain.

And then on the Thursday I was one centimetre dilated finally, in the afternoon and so I was like, ‘Right, okay, great, something might be happening. And then the Thursday night the contractions were still really painful but they changed, so I thought that maybe something might be happening now, and then in the morning, Friday morning I was four centimetres. And then they moved me to the delivery suite in the morning of that day and then basically I dilated a centimetre an hour so I think I went like eleven oclock four centimetres dilated and I got in the bath for a bit, but it was really strange. The contractions were less painful and I hardly had any contractions to get, you know, from four centimetres to ten, you know, I could probably count them on one hand.

So, yeah, then basically at five oclock I think, in the evening I’d had Pethidine again, and loads of gas and air and at five oclock I was ten centimetres and then I started pushing and then she was born twenty-five minutes later.

So that bit was really, you know, quick and straightforward. But it was a really out of body experience I think, because of the gas and air. I just ‘and I felt like really on a mission to do it. I was like I don’t know, maybe you’re like that anyway the first time, you probably are, because it’s probably a natural thing, but I was just like, ‘Right, I’m really going to do this’, [laughs] you know, ‘Nothing can stop me now’, not after like being in hospital since the Tuesday night to the Friday. but then’ so that was all fine, and she was fine, but then I went for a bath afterwards and I was really bleeding heavily. And I said, ‘I don’t’, you know, ‘I really am bleeding, you know, I know you bleed afterwards anyway but this seems like a lot of blood’ and then basically they had loads of doctors come in and I was bleeding from where the placenta was and I had some clots or something, I’m not entirely sure what was what, but then the doctor came in and she had my legs in stirrups and everything and she was picking out these clots from where my placenta was, and it was really, really painful. I was in tears, really stressed out, like [daughter’s name] was in the cot at the side but, you know, it was all’ people were everywhere and the midwife was sort of saying, you know, to the doctor, you know, ‘Be careful, don’t” because she was just really going for it and just like not-, like I was really like beside myself, you know, and this doctor was just’ and I know she had to do it, but she was really just sort of, you know, carrying on with it, just ignoring me. So that was really awful.

But that didn’t, after that, obviously the bleeding stopped and everything and that was fine. But, and I felt at the time, ‘Oh that was awful, that I had to have that’, you know, it wasn’t like a straightforward’ I was so pleased with myself that I

So how do you feel now about the way that [daughter’s name] was delivered this time? How do you feel about this birth?

I’m really proud of myself, that I did it. And it was, I’m really pleased that I’ve experienced both’ You know, afterwards I felt, you know, I was looking at her thinking, ‘I can’t believe I pushed you out!. You know? [laughs]. Because it was a really amazing thing, and I think it’s nice, because you just don’t know how you’ll feel ever about a baby, do you, when it’s born, the bonding and, because it was a second baby and things and I was really sort of thinking, ‘Oh, I hope I can love her as much as, you know, the first one. So that was, it was really nice to have felt that, you know, I had a different experience with her [smiles].

No, my general sort of thought on it is, to be honest, I don’t think it would have matter now, if I’d had a C-section… It, you know, it can be made into a big thing about having a natural birth after a caesarean that it’s going to be so different, you know.

And I actually just think, you know, you’re just happy to have another, you know, healthy baby, and actually although I was really, really pleased that I had a natural birth and very proud of myself, like I say, and really determined to do it, and I really was, I was so glad that I’d done it and that I managed to, or had the chance to. Actually you know, if I’d have had a C-section I would have, I think I would have just, you know, been happy that she was okay, because it did go on so long for me, so I did feel quite, well, very tired by it.