Were you working at all at the time of your illness?

No. What happened was we lost my mum in 88 and it started my rheumatoid off, in 1988, that’s when I actually got the rheumatoid arthritis, and they said it was the shock and the stress of that. And in 2001, as I said, everything was just plodding on nicely and then the one, I don’t think there was anything dramatic or anything that happened, and I just, as I said, I just started losing weight and then finding out that that had happened. But there was nothing that had stressed me up in any way or anything like that. But I’d actually suffered with the rheumo for fifteen years, well no thirteen years I think it was, yeah thirteen years then.

So was that the reason you stopped working or were you not working before that?

Yeah the reason I could, because I got so bad I was having gold injections every week. When my mum died I’d just got made redundant as well, it was just everything happened to me in 1988. And I was just so stressed out with my mum going, getting made redundant and it was, we actually had to go on holiday, I mean we didn’t have holidays at home and we actually went on a holiday that year. But as I said, I got the rheumatoid, and it’s just, it’s a crippling disease and it is and it’s left its mark on me. But it just got so bad that I couldn’t get out of bed in the morning at all. And we used to live in a bungalow and I just, because I couldn’t do stairs and I just could not get out of bed in the morning, I used to lay there and I’d just stay there and it would be dinner time before I could attempt to get out the bed. I used to cry because it was that painful, you couldn’t hold anything, walking, it was like waking on coal, everything about it.

My kids were really, really good, you know, I mean my children have grown up knowing that they had a poorly mum for a lot of years. And fortunately they were old enough, you know, to sort themselves out, which was a good thing. So, but I spent most of my life in bed for a lot of years. But it’s like I’ve got my life back now, I’m just starting to get my life back, it’s nice, I like it. And that’s all down to the rituximab, which is, like I said, it’s the same treatment for the lymphoma. Just amazing really is that. I’m lucky in a way that I’ve got the both and they can treat me with the same stuff, it’s like killing two birds with one stone. Mm.

Mm, so having the lymphoma and the treatment for it hasn’t really interfered with your daily life very much because you coped very well with the treatment.

Yes, yes I did, yes

And compared to the arthritis it hasn’t had much of an impact on you?

No the rheumatoid has been the worst part of my life. The cancer part of it, the lymphoma was just a blip in my life that I got over it, and I did. And I think that’s how I look at it. It wasn’t as bad, I know it was dangerous, but I mean I look at the rheumatoid, you can die of rheumatoid arthritis, so it’s one of those things, you know. And having the cancer as well was just, you know, just an additional little bit to it. But that went and, as I said, the rheumatoid, well they said it would probably be with me for the rest of my life now. They said it doesn’t, it will burnt itself out, but when? It could be a long, long time and, as I said, everything is chronic now because I’ve had it so long, but

Have you made any changes to your lifestyle at all as a result?

A lot. I’m more aggressive now. I never were, I was not, I wasn’t an aggressive person. It made me think about life a lot different, my life’s changed. I had a few words with him upstairs, and I’m not a religious person, but it was all a case of, you know, Why have you done this to me Because I didn’t, I mean I haven’t smoked, right, I mean alright I didn’t have the lung cancer, but I hadn’t smoked or anything, and I just thought, and I didn’t drink a lot, I mean I don’t drink at all now, but I just thought, Why have you done this to me, what have I done to deserve this And it wasn’t until I began to think about, you know, what I’d got, and you’ve a lot to think about. You know, I mean we lost my mum and all I thought was, Well me and my siste, and all I thought were, It must be a famil, it’s got to be hereditary this because my mum has gone, me and my sister wasn’t well, you know, and it just, it does make you angry.

I also remember, and I got a bit nasty, I had to be careful with people because I could just blow at any time, you know. I mean I had some good support but they knew that I could just go off at any time, and I would. And it did, it me a bit nasty because it just makes you think that life, sometimes you’re just dealt a wrong card, you know, and to me you are, it’s whatever you’re dealt right at the beginning of your life. And I just thought, Well we’re here to be tried all of u, so I’m being tried. And that, and it did, it opens your eyes quite a lot, you know, at first you’re just plodding on, then all of a sudden there’s a big hiccup in your life and you think, Why? Why have you done this to me? You know, is it sommat else you wanted me to get through to see if I can do it And I did it and, you know, I must think, well, thought, Well I was strong enough to do it so obviously it’s not my tim. And I still don’t think it’s my time. But yes it does, it makes you think, yeah, whether you’re dealt the right cards a lot of it. Yes, so I had a few words upstairs definitely to just sit there and play pop with him.