Dani – Interview 16
Dani has experienced three main episodes of depression ‘ at 14 when she was first diagnosed, again during Year 12, and her most recent period began when she was about 22. Dani struggles with her self-esteem and when her mood is low finds sharing her feelings difficult. She says her depression has been brought on by feelings of not fitting in at school and stressful life events. Dani has found a combination of medication and counseling helpful, particularly cognitive and mindfulness techniques.
The first signs that things weren’t right for Dani appeared when she was 14 and included a loss of interest in school, difficulty getting up in the morning, poor control of her diabetes and not wanting to spend time with her friends. Although she had been diagnosed with diabetes at age five and was used to managing this well, suddenly she realised that her life was very different from that of her friends, and her vigilance waned. Dani’s mother noticed this, and sensing something was amiss, took her daughter to the doctor. This led to a referral to a psychologist, and the diagnosis of depression.
Dani saw the psychologist regularly for several months, and worked with her on cognitive-behavioural tasks such as challenging negative thoughts, and goal-setting. She found this very helpful, and was able to get back to what she describes as a good place;. This saw her through to Year 12, when the stress of the HSC triggered another episode. Again, the early signs were difficulty completing school work and attending classes, stopping sport and music, and distancing herself from and fighting with her friends. A TV documentary about young people and depression made her realise that she needed help, and she spoke to a teacher at school. This time she was referred to both a psychiatrist and a psychologist, and started antidepressant medication.
Dani found it difficult to accept the need for her to see a psychiatrist and take medication, as felt that this again marked her as different from her friends and peers, when all she wanted was to fit in and be the same as everyone else. However, once she was on a medication that suited her she found that it made her head clearer and helped her to take care of herself better. Throughout her final year of school, Dani continued to work with the psychologist on managing her thoughts and feelings. This was helpful, as was the psychologist’s role as someone she could check in; with every week or so. Although Dani has remained on medication since first taking it, the three or four years following Year 12 were relatively stable and she didn’t need to see any mental health professionals. However at 22, her mood dropped again. This time, she was hospitalised for a short time while a new medication regimen was established, and she has been seeing a psychiatrist since then.
Over the past ten years since her first episode, Dani has come to terms with her depression, and feels that it has helped her grow as a person in that she is now both more accepting of her thoughts and moods. She says a combination of medication and non-medical therapies have worked best for her, as well as talking with her parents and friends about how she is feeling – as hard as this been at times. Art therapy has also been helpful, as has her volunteer work as this makes her realise that she needs to look after herself in order to be able to help others. She feels that health professionals do a good job but could show more empathy at times, and also would like to see more support for the family and friends of people with depression. Dani is looking forward to the future, and has a long list of things she wants to do and experience.