What I’m unsure about in the medication is that I don’t want to increase too much. I’ve got it in the back of my mind that I need to go up slowly. And when I realised a few months ago that I needed to increase the medication, I went up, with the doctor’s agreement, to the smallest possible increase. But then three months later I needed another small increase. And now another two months later, I feel that I still need another increase. And I, I’m going to see the consultant this week and hope that she will increase it and talk me through what medication I ought to be on.

What difference do you notice when you increase it?

My hands are able to move, my right hand particularly is able to move more freely. Simple things like ironing or washing the floor, the right hand doesn’t work sometimes. Holding a knife, trying to chop things, it doesn’t work, it hasn’t got the strength in it now. When I go out walking I seem to fall over my feet a bit. I used to be a, a big walker. I’m not walking as much as I should, not as much as I used to, and I think I ought to make more effort to get out and walk more. But the medication makes me, stops me having all these feelings, especially in my hands. it’s a very difficult thing to explain why you need more medication. Just suddenly things aren’t working as well as they ought to.

I never was one for sitting relaxing very much until an evening. And now if I work in the garden for half an hour and I need to sit down, I go and sit down and have a cup of tea and relax. And then go back and do a little bit more. I found that planting the garden out last year was very difficult. But ten minutes at a time even. Or change what I’m doing, so I’m changing my posture. Sometimes when I’m working in the garden I ache. My shoulders, my neck, my back aches and I have to take paracetamol and change what I’m doing or sit down and relax for a while. it’s adjusting and learning to adjust and accept that that’s, that’s part of having Parkinson’s. But then I get a sense of achievement when I’ve done what I set out to do. I’m trying to dig the garden over to get vegetables in, but I do one row at a time, instead of normally I would have dug the whole plot. I just do one row and plant something. And then the next day, if I’m fit and well, dig and plant again.

I do yoga, which I enjoy enormously. And the teacher has adapted yoga things for me. Whereas other people are standing balancing on one leg, I can put my fingers on the wall and, and still do what they do but with a little bit more help. There are times that one side of me tipples over and she comes and steadies me. And I find that really good.

When we first thought about having Parkinson’s, my husband and I were [name of town].And we sat and discussed it and said, If I have got this, let’s do something positive.Let’s go and have a holiday of a lifetime.Let’s liveSo we, that first year we planned, the whole year, and the second year we went to New Zealand for six weeks.Wonderful holiday, the best thing I ever did, we ever did.It was just fantastic and it made me realise that life’s for living.And I didn’t know anybody who had Parkinson’s.But then found out that [in name of area] where I used to live, there was a lady who I was, an old lady who I was very fond of, who I found out had had Parkinson’s for ten years and I didn’t realise.And she was a fighter.She baked every day and gave things away, and said, I’m never going to stop, because if I stop, I’ll never get going againSo I thought, Right, that’s the same with me.I’m going to do things that, that I want to do, that I need to do.If I want to work in the garden, I’m going to work in the garden

I wondered if there would ever be a time where I would wake up in the morning and not immediately think, I’ve got Parkinson’sThat time’s come.I don’t think like that now.But those first few months it’s there all the time.And this is the, the problem in the first year, that you can get extremely depressed just learning to live with it, learning to know that that’s what you’ve got.You can’t take it away. You’ve got to live with it and you’ve got to live through it, and if possible you’ve got to do the best you can with it.

The main problem I’m having is thatany classes I’ve got to go have got to be on a bus route or get a lift, because I’m going to have to stop driving very soon.I was sent by my GPto, the DVLA asked me for a, a test last year.And I think it was a combination of the Parkinson’s and my eyesight.I had a two hour twenty minute test with the DVLA asking me questions, giving me a physical, slightlyphysical examination, a mental examination, then drivingan unknown car round a track and then driving with two passengers all round the city and down the motorway.Two hours twenty minutes. And I passedand felt, that gave me such a boost to my morale.I hardly ever drive down motorways, but I had to do that in the test and felt oozing with confidence.But I’m not driving much now.

It worries me, a bit.My husband is not domesticated.He’s never, his job has come first in his life, before everything. I’m having to try and teach him how to cook, occasionally. He’s having to come and chop vegetables for me at times. He’s having to do odd jobs that, he’s having to learn how to iron.I feel that there might be a time when I can’t do some of these things and he might have to take over.And I don’t think he understands.If I say, I’m achin he’ll say, Oh, what’s that withAnd I’ll say, Well, it’s just part of it.My body’s aching, my shoulders are aching I’m glad that I’ve got my family near me, but I don’t want to rely upon them. They’ve got their own lives to lead.

I’m hoping that I’ll just, I can go on as long as possible as fit and as well as I am.It is progressing. I know that it is.In two years it has, it has definitely progressed.But then I’ve got another two years and if it’s only progressed the same amount I’ll still be fine. But I’m slowly telling my husband that it might be, that he might have to help more.But I don’t want to think too much about it.

I must say that the authorities have looked after me very well.They sent me to a group where we learnt to do exercises, and gave me information on the Parkinson’s Disease Society, which has made a terrific difference to me.Their leaflets are very informative.I’ve come to rely upon them. And I’ve now discovered that they can do it in large print,because I’m having problems with my eyesight.

We, we, the group met for about five weeks and we had,somebody came to tell us about Social Services, the help that they could give,the speech therapy.And I went and had a, a session with them because my voice becomes croaky at times.And I, I’m unable to sing now, which is a shame because I loved singing in, in church.I’m singing an octave lower and singing alto when I can.But that’s one of the things that I miss, that, that’s affected.