Mervyn’ One thing that kept going through my mind was, Am I going to have another one?’ But I did ask my GP and he said, I can’t really tell you. So I suppose I could or I probably won’t have another one. That’s a little bit of a worry. That’s still on my mind now actually.

So that has been your main worry?

Mervyn’ Yeah. But when I first, when I came out of hospital I, although everybody was very good to me including my family and people at the gym and, they were all concerned and. I say they were very, very helpful indeed. I still, I felt extremely vulnerable and, and anxious all the time. I don’t think it was the fact that, you know, I felt alone as well. I can remember saying to my wife, You know I feel anxious and alone. And although I’m alright now, you know, but I can remember I felt really anxious. One evening I was very anxious. Can you remember [Wife]? I was very anxious and I had to call somebody out didn’t I?

Mervyn’s wife’ [uh huh]

Mervyn’ Do you remember? Yeah and a doctor came didn’t he?

Mervyn’s wife’ Oh yeah.

Mervyn’ Yeah. I’d. I was hyperventilating is it? Yeah but I soon got over that and he assured me I was perfectly alright when he came and
Mervyn’s wife’ When you were on your own you were anxious

Mervyn’ Yeah when I was on my own I felt. Although I was very rarely on my own I felt quite vulnerable.

And for how long did you have these feelings?

Mervyn’ I would say 6 months.

After the heart

Mervyn’ After the actual heart attack and it, then it slowly waned.

And if you have any kind of concern who do you talk to about it? Do you go to your GP and discuss it or?

Mervyn’ Well I get, I have a yearly review with my GP.

And what does that consist of?

Mervyn’ Well he, he weighs me and he reviews my medication and I have a blood test and that’s about it.

Ok.

Mervyn’ The only thing I, I have a blood test but I don’t get the results and I usually have to wait until the next year to find out the results of the blood test.

So can you not phone the surgery before and ask?

Mervyn’s wife’ You asked if you could didn’t you?

Mervyn’ Yeah I asked

Mervyn’s wife’ And he said, it’s not necessary.

Ok would you like to have those results?

Mervyn’ I would yeah. I think that they when I’ve had a blood test as soon as I, well as soon as I’ve had the blood test I think I ought to get the results either through the post or whatever. Just to reassure me. I don’t know if that’s general practice or not but I’d certainly like to know.

So you think it’s something that could be improved.

Mervyn’ Yeah that’s about the only thing I can think of just for peace of mind.

I know I got one lot of results because I’ve got them written down but that’s the only time isn’t it, once? But I’d just like to know.

Have you talked to your GP about it?

Mervyn’ Well not really, no.

You haven’t mentioned it to him that it would be good for you. I mean for your piece of mind to have these results and have them explained to you.

Mervyn’ Yeah I think I’ve got a right to know really but I don’t know. I said, Could I have a telephone appointment this time to get the results. And he said, Oh that won’t be necessary. But I say that’s the only thing. I’d like to know.

But it might be different with other people. They might get their results in another area, I don’t know. I don’t know what their procedure is.

Mervyn’ So I rang NHS Direct and they said that. They asked me what was wrong and different things and then they said, Well we’ll talk to the doctor and he’ll probably, he will get back to you very shortly and he will tell you then what to do. So I waited and the doctor rang me and I again I gave him all the symptoms and he said, I think what we’ll do is

I’ll ring the hospital for you and they will send paramedics down to check you over. The paramedics arrived I would imagine 15 minutes, 15 to 20 minutes later and they checked me over and they then decided that they would take me up to my local hospital. And they, whilst I was in the ambulance I believe they put the spray under my tongue and they also
Did an ECG?

Mervyn’ Yeah I think they did an, yeah they did an ECG and they also. What did they give me?

Mervyn’s wife’ Took some blood.

Mervyn’ Oh yeah they took some blood. On the way in the ambulance up to the hospital I felt violently sick. And we arrived at the hospital and I can’t remember much what happened then. Everything was very vague so I’d probably been given something that probably dulled me a bit.

After you were discharged from hospital did you go back to see the consultant or not?

Mervyn’ Yes. I went once to see the consultant. And that’s when he said to me, that I didn’t know anything about, he said, I’ve still got one artery marginally

Mervvn’s wife’ No moderately

Mervyn’ Moderately blocked.

And but he assured me that the medication would sort it out. But I didn’t know that straight after I had the heart attack but I was told when. I think it was the final assessment from the [Hopsital name] that I was told. So it’s a strange thing really I still don’t know the condition of my heart really. it’s not like if you cut your finger you can say, Oh it’s getting better. But you’ve had a heart attack and you don’t really, you can’t see that it’s getting better although I did, I did a research project didn’t I? I had to go back and have MRI scans.

I had about 4 or 5 over a period of a year, something like that and that was for a research. And I think the person that was running it said that my, the damage to the heart muscle had more or less recovered to about 95% or something like that.

I think it slowly wore off. I was encouraged by my wife to say, Oh don’t worry you will be ok. And things like that and everybody around me, family and it slowly, I say it slowly got better and I’m perfectly. I’ve got no anxiety. I feel really good now.

No. I didn’t try to hide it at all and every time I felt anxious or felt down in the dumps and whatever you like to call it I would tell my wife and she’d be very sympathetic towards me and say, Let’s go out for a walk. I’ll come with you. And it seemed to work.

You said also that for a while you felt lonely.

Yes, yeah, yeah.

Was it because you felt that people would not be able to understand what you were going through?

I don’t know. I don’t know why I felt lonely. I’ve never felt lonely and I suppose it was just a reaction, you know, to what I’ve been through. That’s the only answer I can give you but it’s very, very strange, very strange.