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Interview 45

Age at interview: 19
Brief Outline: She is of the opinion that men can be intimidated by women who are open about enjoying sex. (Played by an actor)
Background: She finished secondary school and is taking a year out before going to University. She works full time and shares a house with other young people. (Played by an actor)

More about me...

 

Explains that she would not be keen to use the coil as a contraceptive method. (Actor)

Explains that she would not be keen to use the coil as a contraceptive method. (Actor)

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Would you consider any other method?

Possibly the coil but, it's really weird I get this really bad image of like an old rusty spring and you know it puts me off a little. You know, I can't really control the coil, you know when I'm on the pill, I know I'm taking it so I know I'm safe, but the coil's inside you and you have no control over it and so I wouldn't know whether it was working or not. 
 

Describes bleeding after she took emergency contraception and the advice she received from her...

Describes bleeding after she took emergency contraception and the advice she received from her...

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Which are the kind of questions that you put through to the helpline?

Well, I had like a side effect in the morning after pill, I took it, and after a couple of days I started bleeding and you know, I was a bit worried like you know, what's going on and everything. 

So like I phoned up the helpline and they told me that the morning after pill had like mucked up my periods and everything, and then I didn't come on for like coming up to two months now. 

So I was like getting really worried now and I was thinking you know, what's going on, so I phoned them back up and they didn't really have any answers. And so I went to the health centre and took a pregnancy test because I didn't know what else to do and it came up negative so, don't really know what to do now.

They advised me not to take my pill until I started my period but like I had two tests and they wouldn't be lying to me and saying I wasn't pregnant, so I decided to take my pill again to see if it restarted my periods.   

That just happened once with the emergency contraception?

Yeah, it just happened the once, but it sort of threw me a little and I was thinking 'what's going on'. I thought you know, it might hurt me if I take it too much and so I thought, right, I've got to be sensible now otherwise it could really harm me. And I don't really know if it's good for you to take it a lot so, I don't really know.   
 

At the moment it is important to avoid pregnancy, but thinks she will feel differently once she...

At the moment it is important to avoid pregnancy, but thinks she will feel differently once she...

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How important is it for you at this moment to avoid pregnancy?

Very important, because you know, I haven't done any training or degree yet and I don't want to fall behind, so you know if I got pregnant like at the end of my training or my degree then it would be fine because primarily I want a child, but not yet as it will take quite a big chunk out of my career and so I need to have like a stable relationship first.

I'm only just starting to look after myself, so I wouldn't be able to look after a child as well, so it's very important that I don't get pregnant.   

What would you do if you got pregnant?

Well I don't really know, I haven't really been in that position, because taking the pregnancy test was a very scary thing to do and I suppose I'd have an abortion, but you know I can't say that until I've been in that position and had the feelings of not knowing what to do.

But I mean it's like difficult to pre-empt it because you can't, you don't know what to do until it happens. 
 

Men can be intimidated by women who are open about enjoying sex. (Actor)

Men can be intimidated by women who are open about enjoying sex. (Actor)

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Some of the women I have interviewed feel that sexual attitudes have not changed and young women are expected not to go out with many boys or be seen to be sexually assertive while the opposite applies to young men, what are your views on this?

Well yeah, I think that's right, I feel ashamed of how many blokes I've slept with you know, sometimes I think 'oh my god' you know...

It's not that many but you know, it's different for boys and girls and I don't care what anyone else says because it's different isn't it you know, because if you're a boy, you're known as a stud but if you're a girl, you're known as easy. But it's really difficult for women because you know, I feel it's difficult to show, that you know, I like sex because you know, some men kind of find it quite intimidating.

Because men want it just as much as women but it goes back to the whole thing that women aren't supposed to have like an appetite, I mean it's like food really you know, women are meant to just like sit back and not say anything. You've got programs like 'Sex in the City' and you read like cosmopolitan and you know, women are supposed to have sex but in real life it's not like that at all.

I think it's a little more difficult for women because they're not allowed to show that they have a healthy appetite for sex, the blokes are meant to do the chasing and the women are meant to play hard to get, you can't really be true to yourself, you're lying a bit about yourself really.

It's difficult because, society still wants to look at it as that the men pursue the women and the women just stand their looking all pretty and kind, because otherwise you know, they're putting it about a lot and it's just difficult.  
 

The emotional side is left out of sexual health information - and it can be hard to express...

The emotional side is left out of sexual health information - and it can be hard to express...

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In your opinion what information do young people require but are not getting?

Well, I think you get told about contraception but you don't really get told about the emotional side of it really, and you can't really talk about it that much and you know, it's not a scary thing really' I don't know. 

In your opinion what are areas related to sexuality and sexual behaviour that young people find the most difficult one to talk about or to seek advice about?

Well for me, I've got a low' pulling from past experience, I've got a low libido and you know, lots of my friends have these great, amazing relationships and I don't really feel like that at all. I'm not really sexually attracted to my boyfriend and it isn't really normal, I found it really quite embarrassing to talk about it, but you know if I could talk to my friends about it, they may have the same problem, but I don't really know because I think people would look upon me as like a freak.     
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