Sharon

Age at interview: 45
Brief Outline: Sharon’s three sons were all stillborn between 19 and 22 weeks of pregnancy.
Background: Sharon is married and is a university tutor in marketing. She has given birth to three sons.
More about me...
Following a history of fertility issues and unsuccessful IVF, Sharon aged 32 had just started a new relationship when she unexpectedly got pregnant. Everything was going well with her pregnancy until at 19 weeks, she had a bleed. On arriving at hospital she was completely shocked to be told her waters had broken. The midwives could not find a heartbeat and her baby Sam was stillborn after a lengthy labour. Sharon found it very hard to cope after the death of her son and left her high-pressure job to train as a teacher.
Two years later Sharon found out she was pregnant again with her son Joseph. At 20 weeks of pregnancy Sharon started to dilate and was given an emergency stitch to try to delay the birth of her baby. After a few days contractions started. The doctor explained that because her baby was going to be born so early they would not be able to resuscitate him. Joseph was stillborn. Sharon found this experience very different as she held her son and he was kept with them all of the time she remained in hospital. She found it particularly touching that the consultant talked to her baby and said sorry to him for not being able to save his life. As she tried to recover from her experience, Sharon found counselling very helpful along with caring for her new rescue dog. She also helped to set up a group for other parents who had experienced the loss of their baby.
Sharon then decided to undergo IVF. After one cycle, she miscarried just a few days after becoming pregnant. Sharon tried a second IVF cycle and got pregnant again aged 39. She had a stitch put in again at 14 weeks and a birth plan was put in place to deliver the baby at 29 weeks of pregnancy. Unfortunately again at 21 weeks Sharon started experiencing contractions and her son Isaac was stillborn. This time, being able to take Isaac home from the hospital and spend time with him had a positive impact on Sharon’s experience. Sharon suffered post-traumatic shock after the birth of Isaac. Following an unsuccessful experience of surrogacy, her consultant offered her a new treatment to try and prevent Sharon going into labour so early in pregnancy but Sharon and her partner decided not to try to have another baby.
Two years later Sharon found out she was pregnant again with her son Joseph. At 20 weeks of pregnancy Sharon started to dilate and was given an emergency stitch to try to delay the birth of her baby. After a few days contractions started. The doctor explained that because her baby was going to be born so early they would not be able to resuscitate him. Joseph was stillborn. Sharon found this experience very different as she held her son and he was kept with them all of the time she remained in hospital. She found it particularly touching that the consultant talked to her baby and said sorry to him for not being able to save his life. As she tried to recover from her experience, Sharon found counselling very helpful along with caring for her new rescue dog. She also helped to set up a group for other parents who had experienced the loss of their baby.
Sharon then decided to undergo IVF. After one cycle, she miscarried just a few days after becoming pregnant. Sharon tried a second IVF cycle and got pregnant again aged 39. She had a stitch put in again at 14 weeks and a birth plan was put in place to deliver the baby at 29 weeks of pregnancy. Unfortunately again at 21 weeks Sharon started experiencing contractions and her son Isaac was stillborn. This time, being able to take Isaac home from the hospital and spend time with him had a positive impact on Sharon’s experience. Sharon suffered post-traumatic shock after the birth of Isaac. Following an unsuccessful experience of surrogacy, her consultant offered her a new treatment to try and prevent Sharon going into labour so early in pregnancy but Sharon and her partner decided not to try to have another baby.
Sharon’s midwife made the special arrangements so she could talk her baby home for a few days. This was incredibly important as she had had to leave her two previous sons at the hospital.
Sharon’s midwife made the special arrangements so she could talk her baby home for a few days. This was incredibly important as she had had to leave her two previous sons at the hospital.
They were - they were very geared up for the fact that they carried our baby out of hospital, like they would any other baby. They carried him to the car, and they strapped him in, as if he was alive. He's a baby. So I didn't leave that hospital without my baby, I left with my baby this time, to bring him home.
Mmm. And that meant a huge amount.
It meant a huge amount. But the fact that they did that - We would never have asked for that. The fact that they knew that they could do that, and they knew that they'd have to get certificates, and they knew they'd have to get signatures, but they were willing to do that. They didn't get our hopes up, but they said "Would you like that, if it's possible?" And then they came and said, "It's possible, and we've got the signatures. And we've got -." They already had the thing from the police. And I just thought that was -
For me, they were making sure that I wasn't going through the same experience again.